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Ultimately, what's the point of ultimatum to leave the nest?

3 generations can live together without problems, reader says.

DEAR HARRY: I have been thinking of writing to you for more than a year. You responded to a letter about a financial problem of adult children living with parents. I refuse to call these children "boomerang kids." I'm 24, and I never really left home even though I resided at my college for four years. It was just natural for me to live here as long as I was not able or willing to have my own place. We have three generations living in a nice four-bedroom house. Except for my grandmother, we all pitch in monetarily and with household chores. This is done cheerfully and respectfully. My parents were almost always in a three-generational living situation while single. We are closer because we live together. I'm engaged to be married, and I will live here until then. I don't believe that giving me an ultimatum to leave serves any purpose.  

WHAT HARRY SAYS: Both my wife and I grew up in three-generational families. Neither of us was ever given an ultimatum. In my family, Mom handled all the money and decided on allowances. We were poor, but we made it. With six high-spirited kids floating around, there were plenty of opinions and arguments, but never a dispute about money. We were as close as the petals of a rose. Of course, situations arise in which young adults may need a kick in the rear to get them moving, and they need the ultimatums, but surveys have shown that these are not the norm.

write to him at Daily News, 801 Market St., Philadelphia, PA 19107.