From: Gonzalez, John

To: Ford, Bob; Fox, Ashley
Subject: All-stars

There's been a lot of talk about Chase Utley and Raul Ibanez dominating the NL all-star balloting. Now Pedro Feliz and Carlos Ruiz are moving up as well. Both are fourth at their respective positions. It would be tough for Feliz to catch David Wright, but Ruiz and the other catchers (Yadier Molina, Brian McCann and Jason Kendall) are all lumped pretty close together. Considering how well both Feliz and Ruiz have played defensively - not to mention that both are far better at the plate than they were last year - do they deserve to make the Midsummer Classic?

From: Ford, Bob
To: Gonzalez, John; Fox, Ashley
Subject: All-stars

I'll answer, but first I have to know. Is this really you, Johnzo, or is it just your picture and someone else is doing the writing? This is some carnival fun house you've got going here. I saw Phil's picture yesterday, but he had this sultry voice. What was that about?

I like Pedro Feliz and Carlos Ruiz, but I'm not sure either is an all-star. The last thing I'd want is ballot-stuffing like those yahoos in Cincinnati do all the time. Take your all-stars with class and don't make a big deal out of it.

From: Fox, Ashley
To: Gonzalez, John; Ford, Bob
Subject: All-stars

Seriously, I know people love and miss Phil, but was that really necessary to run his picture with my words? Sheesh. At least change the words.

I'm with Bobby on this one. Feliz and Ruiz are nice role players, but all-stars? On this team? I don't think so. You could make an argument for a bunch of other Phillies - obviously Ibanez and Utley, even Howard and J-Roll - but Feliz and Ruiz? No. Not really. And please, no ballot-stuffing. That's lame.

From: Gonzalez, John
To: Ford, Bob; Fox, Ashley
Subject: All-stars

Nuts to that. I say stuff the hell out of the ballot box and get both of them to St. Louis. The more Phils, the better. If you ain't cheatin', you ain't tryin'. Besides, MLB practically encourages fans to vote for their favorite players. I think a lot of Fightin's fans like the job that Ruiz and Feliz have done this year and wouldn't mind rewarding them with a nice little mini-vacation to St. Louis.

About the other thing: I like Phil. And I like Ashley. But I don't like the idea that they might be the same person. Scares me a little. A lot, actually.

From: Fox, Ashley
To: Gonzalez, John; Ford, Bob
Subject: All-stars

I assure you, on so many levels, Phil and I are NOT the same person. And I guarantee he would say the same.

From: Gonzalez, John
To: Ford, Bob; Fox, Ashley
Subject: All-stars

How can we be sure Phil and Ashley aren't the same people? If it's in the newspaper, then it must be true.

From: Ford, Bob
To: Gonzalez, John; Fox, Ashley
Subject: All-stars

No, if it's in the newspaper, it was true yesterday.