Do I risk my stress-free run club for a relationship that might not work out?

Is it worth it to risk part of your community for love? I invited two Inquirer staffers — one runner, and a running hater who likes drama —to help answer the question.

Have a question of your own? Or an opinion? Email me.

Evan Weiss, Deputy Features Editor

This week’s question is…

I’m in a run club, which I love because it’s chill. But, there’s another runner I want to date. Do I risk my stress-free run club for a relationship that might not work out?

Bedatri D. Choudhury, Arts & Entertainment Editor (hobby runner)

I am a hobby runner but was in a run club once, let’s go!

Beatrice Forman, Food and Dining Reporter (running hater)

Did you ever hit on anyone in your run club, Bedatri? Or get hit on?

Bedatri D. Choudhury

I joined a run club because I was new to the country and read somewhere that it’s a great place to socialize. That or Equinox. I couldn’t afford Equinox.

It’s a group of fit people sweating together. I don’t think it graduated to hitting on, but there was definitely some scoping out.

Beatrice Forman

I actually went to one of those run clubs for singles last year for a story that never saw the light of day and got hit on twice! And even then, it felt a little out of place to me given that it’s hard to banter while jogging.

Bedatri D. Choudhury

Take it outside the club. Get their number, text, etc.

Should someone do it? I’d lean toward yes, go ahead and date.

Beatrice Forman

That makes sense, though I guess I wonder what happens after.

If you make a move and it doesn’t work out, or you date and it also doesn’t work out, do you keep showing up? Who gets custody of the run club?

Bedatri D. Choudhury

A run club is low stakes. I know a couple that are not breaking up formally because they share a couples-only rate for a Life Time gym membership.

Beatrice Forman

I would tolerate so much for a discounted Life Time membership.

I did have a friend who hooked up with too many people in her run club that she was asked to leave, actually. And another who broke up with a fellow runner and then left because she had to watch them flirt with other runners.

So your mileage literally does vary.

Bedatri D. Choudhury

I just think it’s about not dragging others into your drama. If it’s not working out makes you incapable of seeing this person again, just opt out of the run club. Better still, start one of your own.

But hey, if it works out then it’s a whole world of possibilities.

Beatrice Forman

I’m definitely in the shoot-your-shot camp, but she needs to be mindful of how she makes her move.

I know a lot of people are turned off by the idea of mixing running and romance (source: I read an article about this), so I would hate for her to put herself out there — which is good — and then get shunned because she didn’t respect the vibes of the club.

Bedatri D. Choudhury

I am totally in the shoot-your-shot tent too, but if this club is very important to her, she should also be mindful if the date doesn’t go well.

Beatrice Forman

Yes! I personally would never risk having to give up a space or hobby that matters to me over a partnership gone south. There’s more to life than literally running toward a relationship, so it’s really up to her if she likes the person enough to see it through.

Bedatri D. Choudhury

Yeah my parents met at work and kept working together for 40-something years. Go get an acai bowl and talk about your favorite color. Like a wise man once said, “You have brains in your head. You have feet in your [running] shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.”

Beatrice Forman

Is that wise man Dr. Seuss?

Bedatri D. Choudhury

Yes.

Beatrice Forman

I vote that she discreetly asks for their number while they do quad stretches or whatever it is that you’re supposed to do to warm up.

Bedatri D. Choudhury

Then if the club throws you out, you can run together.