When, oh when, are we going to stop looking at the spoiled train wreck named Lindsay Lohan with sympathy?
I, for one, am tired of having to watch this glorified version of white trash (complete with bleached locks, artificially-inflated lips and QT’d epiderm) cut a shameful swath through the criminal justice system.
So she’s an addict. So what? No one put the glass in her hand, the happy juice in her veins or the powder up her indignantly-flared nostrils. In fact, the only things ‘controlled’ about this mess of a human being are the substances she consumes for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
And who cares that once, eons ago, she turned in some above-average performances as a Disney star. Although her freckled winsomeness did have its charms, especially in the remake of “The Parent Trap” (although the original version with Hayley Mills was much better since its star had both a superior acting technique and bloodline,) it’s been almost ten years since LiLo (who has done anything but Lie Low this past decade) has turned in a truly solid performance. That includes “Mean Girls” which is notable not for Lohan’s development as an actress but for her development. Seemingly overnight.
Call me a cruel, intolerant (but sober) woman who doesn’t understand how difficult it is for Hollywood children to avoid the temptations of fame, particularly when you are the offspring of a jackass and a hyena (you figure out which is which.) Had Lohan been raised in a cave with wolves, she might have actually turned out better.
But the days of blaming Mommy and Daddy dearest are over. This twenty-four year old felon, um, feline should have come to the end of her nine lives by now. While the criminal justice system is doing its best to deal with prison overcrowding and ridiculously-lenient laws by allowing Lohan to skate with what is essentially a two-week stint in her bedroom, we should stop talking about the tragedy of Lindsay Lohan. We should stop feeling sorry for the poor little substance abuser who just can’t help herself.
It’s a very stale script. Poorly-rendered by a very stale actress.