Those familiar with Major League Baseball's official Twitter account are probably very annoyed and currently rolling their eyes.

MLB insists - insists - on hiring snickering gigglepusses to maintain their Twitter presence, the end result being gems like these.

We should all be so lucky to generate timeless humor based on movies from 13 years ago or casual misogyny. We should also consider the cringing involved in clicking "tweet" on something that lauds the talents of Jeff Francoeur.

Anyway, MLB has announced that they will be making their Twitter account PRIVATE today from noon to 4 p.m. Those "lucky" enough to be in their big secret club at the time will be eligible for prizes and World Series tickets and probably some sort of super secret, even more awesome jokes.