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The Mets need your signature for something totally innocent

The Mets are playing some inspired 15-11 baseball, throttling a damp Cole Hamels last night for a 6-1 victory. The win put them on the same plane as the equally 15-11 Yankees, but did little to squelch the inferiority complex the Mets have always had with their crosstown brethren, just because the Yankees have been around so much longer, have always had better players, are more universally known, have never been involved in any ponzi schemes, never had packs of stray dogs terrifying people outside the stadium, and don't play in New York's illustrious Chop Shop District.


That doesn't mean the Mets don't deserve you respect, say the Mets. So they are sending out letters like these to all of their fans or season ticket holders or something so that they can then sign a petition and perhaps win a chance to present the same letter to the Mets, who apparently won't have read it by then.

All of which raises some questions.

  1. What is this a petition for?

  2. The Yankees existed six decades before the Mets. Wouldn't #trueNewYorkers be Yankees fans and Mets fans be bandwagon jumpers?

  3. The Mets have at least as many late-season collapses as they do World Series titles. Do true New Yorkers also collapse?

  4. ...Is this some kind of scam?

The Mets, after seeing the empty lower level seats in Yankee Stadium last night, are trying to grab the blue collar New Yorker vote, assuming that rich snobs who are afraid of the rain stay in the Bronx/are terrified to come to Flushing. And like all blue collar fans, the Mets know their fans will appreciate some commercial e-mails after signing a petition that means nothing.