On mobile? Click here to enlarge
Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!
There are points to be scored. There are games to be won.
And the magical things you can do with that ball
will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Clearly, Dr. Seuss wouldn't be a fan of Sam Bradford and the 2015 Eagles, a team that has seen its offense devolve from a winning fire hose of scoring to a 3-win dripping faucet of disappointment.
(And before readers take my cartoon too literally, no, I don't think Tim Tebow should be the Eagles starting quarterback. In fact, he may be the only quarterback that would be worse than Bradford.)
Things won't get any easier this week for Bradford, who faces a tough Cowboys defense that held the Eagles to just 10 points back in Week 2. I would say one saving grace is the Cowboys are the worst team in the league at forcing turnovers (tied with the Ravens), but two of the teams four takeaways this season were Bradford interceptions.
Currently, Bradford sits near the bottom of the league when it comes to interceptions (10), yards per attempt (6.4) and quarterback rating (76.4, which is even worse that his abysmal 78.9 career average). Despite appearing to look better two weeks ago against the Panthers, Bradford still managed to complete less than 60 percent of his passes and throw yet another interception.
Derk Sarley broke down Bradford's problems with quarterback rating, ESPN's Total Quarterback Rating (32nd in the league) and years per attempt like this in the Daily News:
Bradford's statistical output isn't just worse than Mark Sanchez achieved last year in the same offense — he's perilously close to falling below Sanchez's career numbers in these categories. This is not league-average productivity if you just assume away a couple of drops.
Despite all this, coaches assure us in the vaguest way possible that Bradford is improving.
"I think Sam is making improvements each week," said and unspecific Pat Shurmur, according to Zach Berman. "We look at it from the fundamentals standpoint, from the accuracy of the throws, being more familiar with the concepts and the progressions, and I think he's making improvement."
And here's Chip Kelly's assessment of Bradford, transcribed by Philly Voice's Jimmy Kempski:
What were your takeaways from evaluating Bradford? Did you see him trending?
CHIP KELLY: I think Sam's done a nice job.
Anything further into that about what your takeaways were?
Done a good job, nice job.
I mean, there is obviously more to it.
Yeah, that's how I feel about it. I think Sam's done a good job.
Is there anything you've seen Bradford progress in from Week 1 in terms of getting better?
Yeah, I think Sam has improved as the season has gone along, yes.
So while I'm hopeful that Bradford is improving and can turn things around, until someone can explain to me how he's actually improving, I'll remain skeptical, as I've been since the moment the Eagles traded for him.
Here are some more Bradford cartoons I've drawn this season: