Florida man defends himself against ‘woman with fangs’ via Hall & Oates’ ‘Rich Girl’

Pop quiz, tough guy: A woman with fangs shows up at your door and indicates that a vampire-based human sacrifice is about to occur. What do you do?

If you answered: "Dance on top of your car while blasting Hall & Oates' 'Rich Girl' at full volume in the driveway of a local sheriff's deputy," you answered...um...the question, that's for sure. Good for you.

At least one man, Christian Radecki of Cape Coral, Florida, would agree with that course of action — considering, of course, he found himself in the same situation in April.

Via the Smoking Gun:

"Radecki explained that he went to [Sgt. Frederic] Janke's residence because "when he opened his front door, a woman with fangs was threatening him, and that a human sacrifice was about to occur involving vampires." Investigators added that Radecki claimed that he "made the conscious decision to get the Sheriff of Nottingham to help him stop the slaughter of small children."

In other words, she was a maneater. (Sorry.)

Like any reasonable person would do, Radecki drove over to Sgt. Frederic Janke's house after the incident to perform the interpretive dance you see above. Ultimately, Radecki also stole an American flag and destroyed Janke's vehicle's windshield wipers.

Radecki, 44, was arrested and charged with disturbing the peace and later was released on $2,250 bail. Several weeks after that, he was arrested on petty larceny charges and placed in Lee County Jail, where he awaits trial for both incidents.

But, as you might notice, he isn't dead due to a vampire attack or some other ritual sacrifice involving blood-sucking monsters, just in jail. In that sense, Hall & Oates really did the trick.

So keep Mr. Radecki in mind the next tie a bloodthirsty fiend shows up on your front stoop. And, please, make sure you have the Sherriff of Nottingham on speed dial.

[Gawker]