DEAR ABBY: I recently attended a baby shower for a dear high-school friend and his wife. The day after the shower, she posted a slide show on Facebook titled "Thanks for All Our Gifts" with a picture of each gift and who gave it. She has had numerous miscarriages and held this shower at five months, knowing the baby is not yet at a viable stage.
Although I feel sympathy for her fertility issues, and especially for her husband who desperately wants to be a father, I think this is a bid for attention. I am disgusted at how she seems to be bragging about her haul, yet prepping everyone to give her an outpouring of support if there is another tragic loss.
Who does this? I am ...
— Speechless in North Carolina
DEAR SPEECHLESS: Most baby showers are given four to six weeks before the mother's due date. However, it's possible that your friend's wife had hers at five months because, with her history of miscarriages, she's excited that her pregnancy seems to be progressing well and she's thinking positively about the outcome. I hope it works out well and so should you.
As to her method of thanking everyone for the gifts, she may never have been taught that individual thank-you notes should have been sent to each guest. Because it is clear that you are closer to the husband than the wife, perhaps you should tip him off that it's still not too late for them to do the right thing and suggest he help her with them. n