Sideshow: Gretchen Mol is heading our way

Gretchen Mol

is on her way to the Main Line to join the cast of

Tenure

, a comedy also starring

Luke Wilson

and

David Koechner

.

Mol (

3:10 to Yuma

,

The Notorious Bettie Page

,

Rounders

) will play a hot, smart college professor competing with Wilson's slightly less ambitious character for tenure at a university. Koechner plays Wilson's best friend, an anthropology professor obsessed with finding Bigfoot. Shooting starts Monday at Rosemont College, one of several local campuses that will be used in filming.

Mike Million

wrote the script and will make his directorial debut on the film, which is produced by

Paul Schiff

,

Tai Duncan

and

Brendan McDonald

. Executive producers are

Kelly Rodriques

,

Richard Hull

and

Dominic Ianno

.

- Michael Klein

Maybe comedian

Jerry Seinfeld

has more in common with his comic-book idol

Superman

than we thought.

Over the weekend, the vintage-car collector flipped his 1967 Fiat while driving alone on Long Island. He walked away from the wreck and returned to his East Hampton home without medical assistance.

Apparently the brakes failed on the car and Seinfeld yanked on the wheel as he approached an intersection, causing the two-door sedan to tumble.

East Hampton Town Police Chief

Todd Sarris

told the New York Post that the funnyman's desperate maneuver "probably avoided a very serious accident."

Seinfeld, 53, made light of the incident.

"Because I know there are kids out there, I want to make sure they all know that driving without braking is not something I recommend, unless you have professional clown training or a comedy background, as I do," he said. "It is not something I plan to make a habit of."

Madonna

is always speaking in that bizarre, pretentious faux-English accent. But maybe she has some French blood coursing through her as well, judging by new accounts of her high school years.

"I didn't fit into the popular group," the 49-year-old singer tells the May issue of Vanity Fair. "I wasn't a hippie or a stoner, so I ended up being the weirdo. I was interested in classical ballet and music, and the kids were quite mean if you were different."

"Instead of being a doormat," she says, "I decided to emphasize my differences. I didn't shave my legs. I had hair growing under my arms. I refused to wear makeup, or fit the ideal of what a conventionally pretty girl would look like."

Now we're dying to know who took this teenaged Yeti to the prom.

Record executives at the Universal Motown label are biting their lacquered fingernails, wondering if the next album by Hollywood hellion

Lindsay Lohan

is ever going to get done.

"Universal is trying to make her new album a success by lining up great producing talents, and, recently, they even hooked

Timbaland

. But Lindsay has canceled their planned meetings twice," a label insider told the New York Daily News.

Lohan's busy press agent denied that Lindsay had missed meetings, and said Timbaland had yet to be approached to collaborate on the album.

Talk-show valkyrie

Kathie Lee Gifford

promises we'll see a new, improved version of her personality when she returns to cohost the fourth and final hour of NBC's

Today

on Monday.

Gifford assured People.com that the years had mellowed her, making for a less strident and selfish return to the spotlight. "I can handle it better now, and I'm wiser," Gifford says. "At my age, you give up your thighs but you gain wisdom.

"This show is about other people, not about the hosts," she goes on. "Thank God it's older than I am. It's 56 years old. But I'm now the oldest person on the show!"

We give it a week before Gifford's 54-year-old toxic claws emerge.

CBS anchor

Katie Couric

was to read her 12-year-old daughter's favorite poem at a literary event at Avery Fisher Hall in Manhattan this week.

But first she had a little confession to make.

"Most people don't know this, but I am a published poet," she announced from the stage.

"My first poem was published in the St. James Grammar School Gazette. It was a poem about snow. I've never told anyone that I plagiarized that poem. It was really written by

Penny Eastman

. After 45 years of keeping that secret, I am relieved to finally get it off my chest."

Good for you, Katie. If the math stays true, in the year 2052, we can expect an apology from you for taking a purloined Wall Street Journal article on the joys of libraries and reading it as your own on your CBS video blog last year.