Dear Abby: Monday at 3 p.m.: Remember the fallen

DEAR ABBY:

Would you please invite all Americans to stand together, unified in spirit, for 60 seconds of respectful silence during the National Moment of Remembrance at 3 p.m. local time this Memorial Day?

The purpose of this moment is a noble one: to honor America's fallen. The freedoms we take for granted each day are reminders of their ultimate sacrifice and our ongoing debt to them. We mourn our fallen and honor their courageous legacy and the future they bequeathed to us.

The agony of a fallen soldier's mother is as old as war. One such mother is Sallie Stubenhofer. Her son, Mark, was killed by a sniper in Iraq. He left three young children, including a daughter who was born four months after his return to active duty. Mark and his wife named their baby Hope, which signified what he wanted to offer his children and all children.

The Moment of Remembrance and our year-long, lifelong determination to "live honoring America's fallen" are in memory of Army Capt. Mark Stubenhofer and all those brave members of our military who have died in the service of our nation. We invite all Americans to pause in their Memorial Day activities at 3 p.m. local time to honor those who live in our history, reside in our hearts and rest forever in the arms of God.

- Carmella La Spada, White House Commission on Remembrance

DEAR CARMELLA: I am pleased to convey your invitation to observe the annual Moment of Remembrance.

Readers, Memorial Day is Monday. I hope you will join me and millions of other Americans at 3 p.m. local time in giving heartfelt acknowledgment of our fallen heroes for the noble sacrifice they have made in the name of freedom.

DEAR ABBY: I am 25 and have fallen in love with "Brad," a wonderful and very successful businessman. On a recent trip out of town, my co-workers were joking that we were going to elope.

I told Brad about it and how ridiculous it was, since we have been dating only about six months. He replied that we couldn't elope because I haven't signed a pre-nup! I stewed over it for a couple of days and, because I couldn't get it off my mind, brought it up again and asked him if he was serious.

Brad said he was. He said he has worked hard for what he has (which I understand) and mentioned the fact that I have a failed first marriage. I didn't think that was fair. My husband had cheated on me, and we were married only a few months. We talked further, and Brad said that if he thought I was with him because of his money, he wouldn't be with me.

I understand his reasons for wanting a pre-nup, but doesn't getting one indicate that we are preparing to fail? I am pretty sure marriage will be in our future, and I'll sign a pre-nup (after my attorney reviews it), but it seems like negative thinking. How can I get my head around this?

- Don't Feel Trusted in Alabama

DEAR DON'T: One way to "get your head around it" would be to remember that a pre-nuptial agreement carries with it guarantees for BOTH parties. Many couples have them to protect assets accumulated before marriage. Such a document not only protects the man, it can be structured so that YOU have certain guarantees should the marriage not work out.

I strongly recommend that you discuss this with your attorney before you discuss it with Brad again. As with any other legal document, I agree that it should be reviewed with your legal counsel before you sign it. *