So, what's in a

keffiyeh

, anyway?

Dunkin' Donuts has yanked an ad featuring

Rachael Ray

, because it features the Food Network star wearing what looks like a

keffiyeh

, a popular headdress 'n' scarf worn by Arab men (of all ages and walks of life). Why yank it? The large cloth, which comes in black- and red-checked designs, has become associated with Palestinians, especially former Palestine Liberation Organization leader

Yassir Arafat

, who wore one. (Maybe Dunkin' execs worry that if you see the ad, you'll forever associate donuts with the Israeli-Palestinian conflict - and who wants to dunk a war in their morning coffee?)

Sadly, Fox News commentator

Michelle Malkin

's cool, collected and non-biased description of the cloth hasn't diffused the controversy. "The

keffiyeh

," Malkin said, "has come to symbolize murderous Palestinian jihad."

Dunkin' D insists "no symbolism was intended" with the accessory.

Whose karma? What justice?

Sharon Stone

, who last week said China was hit by a devastating earthquake May 12 as a result of bad karma, has drawn the ire of numerous Chinese organizations and individuals, including

Ng See-Yuen

, founder of the UME Cineplex movie-theater chain, who says his theaters will no longer show any of Stone's films.

Last week, Stone, 50, said the quake was a result of bad karma the Chinese government has accumulated because of its treatment of Tibet.

"I'm not happy about the way the Chinese are treating the Tibetans," Stone said, "because I don't think anyone should be unkind to anyone else."

No comment yet from Stone or the Chinese government.

The case of the unworthy room

A rep for

Eddie Griffin

has denied claims by a TV production manager who says the performer beat him up.

Vince Beane

, who has filed a lawsuit against Griffin, claims the actor - known for his role on the UPN comedy series

Malcolm & Eddie

- attacked him because Beane booked a cheap hotel for the star and his mom.

"We cannot comment on the details of ongoing litigation, except to say that this claim is completely absurd and that it will be shown in time to be without merit," Griffin's rep said.

Madonna wins in Malawi

The case of the Malawian pauper and the American princess (the one with the ludicrously fake English accent) is finally over.

A judge in a Malawi court yesterday gave his final seal of approval to

Madonna

's adoption of

David Banda

, 2, whom she met at an orphanage in '06.

Justice

Andrew Nyirenda

said Madge, 49, and her British filmmaker husband,

Guy Ritchie

, "are perfect parents" for David.

"I am glad it's all over," said David's biological dad,

Yohane Banda

, 33, a farmer. "I am glad David has a new, good home."

David's mom died when he was a month old.

Ready to wed, baby!

Faux-celeb

Heidi Montag

, 21, who was engaged to her

Hills

co-star

Spencer Pratt

for six months last year, tells Us Weekly she's finally ready to commit to her man. "I'm ready to marry Spencer," the post-

de

-

Beauvoir

ian existential heroine says. "He's my soulmate."

Well, it's more like she's

pre-ready

: "We were walking at sunset, and [Spencer] had a little picnic made for me, with chocolate-covered strawberries and Dom Perignon," the girlie-girl says. "It was pretty much a preproposal." (A full proposal would have required Cristal.)

3 Doors Down prevails

Debuting atop the Billboard album charts this week,

3 Doors Down

's self-titled album moved 154,000 copies, according to numbers from Nielsen SoundScan. Billboard.com says rapper

Bun B

, one-half of the hip-hop duo

UGK

, debuts at No. 2 with

II Trill

, which sold 98,000 copies, while

Dancing With the Stars

champ Julianne Hough takes third place with the debut of her self-titled CD, which moved 67,000 units.

$15,000 per lip

In the latest sign that our nation's celebrity sickness has become terminal, the Los Angeles Times reports that photo agencies say they will pay one lucky paparazzo between $30,000 to $150,000 for capturing 15-year-old teen starlet

Miley Cyrus

' first kiss. (The more famous the guy she kisses - say, someone like

Shia LaBeouf

- the higher the price.)

Dourdan avoids jail

CSI

star

Gary Dourdan

pleaded guilty yesterday to two counts of felony drug possession (for cocaine and ecstasy) in Indio, Calif., in a plea deal that will keep him out of jail. (A third count, for heroin posession, was dropped.) Dourdan was busted with the goodies last month in Palm Springs.

He has been given until Nov. 20, 2009, to complete drug-ed courses.

Math homework, not lust

American Idol

runner-up

David Archuleta

, 17, tells

Live With Regis and Kelly

that after this summer's

Idol

tour, he's going to eschew any and all affairs of the heart so he can hunker down on his schoolwork. The Miami native will be entering his senior year.

T.I. to get real on MTV

Talk about American ingenuity:

T.I.

(born

Clifford Harris

) has signed a deal with MTV to star in a reality show that will feature the self-proclaimed King of the South's performing 1,000 hours of community service, which the rapper must complete following his conviction on federal weapons charges. T.I., 27, is expected to talk to youth groups about the dangers of guns and gangs.

"Hopefully," he said, "the mistakes I've made will be a lesson to today's youth."

T.I. will follow the community service with a one-year prison term.

Sanjaya = K-Fed + 1 year?

Proving that there is life after

Idol

,

Sanjaya Malakar

has been cast to star in a real-life commercial for Nationwide Insurance, for its "Life Comes at You Fast" campaign, which last year featured

Kevin Federline

.

Contact "SideShow" at sideshow@phillynews.com.

This column contains information from Inquirer wire services and from Web sites.