Ask Amy: Pot comes first, then his girlfriend

Dear Amy: My girlfriend and I have been together more than two years. We deeply love each other, but lately there has been a lot of conflict.

First of all, I am an addict. I have been smoking marijuana for five years and have no intention of quitting unless my life depends on it.

Second, I don't enjoy being told what to do. I'm 19 years old and I'm letting her stay in "my" apartment. Since when does she control my life?

She thinks it's OK to schedule events without even asking me whether I am interested.

My girlfriend is also a very negative person. She worries about worst-case scenarios and always overreacts when anything goes wrong. Whenever I try to bring something up, she will shut me down.

I really want to fix our problem but don't know really whether it's worth it. I don't know what to do, so can you give me advice?

Dear Miserable: When you confess your addiction and then announce that you have no intention of quitting, unless your life depends on it, you hand me the opportunity to say that your life does depend on it.

Marijuana impairs your judgment and cognitive abilities, and your young and still-growing brain has been affected by this chemical influence.

Proof of this is that according to your own list of priorities, weed comes first, girlfriend second.

You could assume that your girlfriend's excessive worrying is probably linked to your addiction.

You haven't made this connection because you're a pothead, and the thing about being high is that you miss some fairly important stuff.

I appreciate your desire to work on your relationship, but until you clean up your own act and commit to recovery, you won't be able to fix your other problems. I hope you'll make the choice to get and stay sober.