Sideshow: Pet therapist for the first pooch?

First lady

Michelle Obama

said yesterday that she had her hands full with the nation's newly ensconced first puppy, the reportedly über-rambunctious Portuguese water dog

Bo

.

Obama, who was speaking at a Take Your Child to Work Day event for more than 100 children, said Bo was, in a word, nutty.

"He's kind of crazy, but he's still a puppy. So he likes to play a lot," she said.

Obama said Bo liked to chew on people's feet and played at all hours of the night.

Where did the

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

come from? What drove them to make their home in the filthy sewers? What horrible trauma did they suffer as wee infant turtles to make them into such fierce killing machines?

Those questions might be answered in a new live-action film slated for 2011, which will dig into the crime fighters' origins. (Which thesps would you pick to play the shelled heroes?)

What's more, the Tribeca Film Festival yesterday hosted a "Shell-ebration" of the TV show's 25th anniversary with a screening of its first movie adaptation.

As Variety notes with gusto, this year's Cannes film fest, May 13-24, will pit some of the world's biggest cinematic heavyweights against each other.

Films in competition include Quentin Tarantino's remake of the WWII exploitation actioner Inglourious Basterds, featuring Brad Pitt, Samuel L. Jackson and Mike Myers; Ang Lee's comedy Taking Woodstock, with Liev Schreiber; Jane Campion's love letter to John Keats' love life, Bright Star; Pedro Almodóvar's farce Broken Embraces, starring Penelope Cruz; and Ken Loach's workingman-friendly drama Looking for Eric.

Impressive, no? But there's more.

A slew of other auteurs will be vying for prizes, including Lars von Trier (Antichrist), Michael Haneke (The White Ribbon), Isabel Coixet (Map of the Sounds of Tokyo), and Marco Bellocchio (Vincere). Info: www.festival-cannes.com.

Alaska's most eligible bachelor,

Levi Johnston

, on Wednesday heroically withstood enhanced interrogation by CNN's ever-obsequious, avuncular newsman

Larry King

.

Johnston refused to answer a question about whether he and his baby's mama, Alaska's first daughter Bristol Palin, performed sex in the Palin family home.

"You know, Larry, that I'm a gentleman, you know. And I don't, you know, kiss and tell," said the gallant high school dropout who (inadvertently) got B. pregnant when she was 17.

Johnston, who earlier this month dished plenty of details about his sex life on Tyra Banks' gab show, said news that B. was pregnant "came as a bit of a shock." Seems Johnston wants to dish more: Reportedly, he is shopping around a memoir about his time with B., whose mum is famed conservative Sarah Palin. Given the young man's obvious verbal skills, we're sure it'll be a classic.

American Idol

's fourth wheel,

Kara DioGuardi

, tells

Entertainment Tonight

that rumors she is leaving the show are poppycock.

"Who quits American Idol!? I definitely didn't quit," she said in an interview set to air last night. "I love the show, and I love my fellow judges. There's no feud with Paula [Abdul], there's no feud with Simon [Cowell]. No beef. All is good."

So what's the beef with next season?

"I'm signed up for one season, so we'll see."

Looks as if the third installment of the gazillion-selling

Twilight

saga,

The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

, is in good hands. Summit Entertainment says it has signed

David Slade

to helm the pic, which is due out next summer.

Slade's awesome resume includes Ellen Page's twisted sex thriller Hard Candy and the decade's bleakest vampire pic, 30 Days of Night.

Summit says Eclipse has a radically different storyline: "Bella [Kristin Stewart] . . . finds herself surrounded by danger as Seattle is ravaged by . . . mysterious killings, and a malicious vampire continues her quest for revenge."

Wait, didn't we see that already?

Local-hero-made-good

Terrence Howard

, who dropped out of

Iron Man 2

amid a salary dispute, tells Parade.com that he pities the fool who decided to skimp on the film's budget.

"Marvel made a choice, and it was a very, very bad choice. They didn't keep their word," Howard said, adding that the studio also tried to shortchange costar Gwyneth Paltrow. (Don't worry: Gwyn will be in the sequel.) Howard has been replaced by Don Cheadle.