Ask Amy: Yes, it's strange in the U.S., too

Dear Amy:

I am a non-American woman in my mid-30s.

I have been dating a guy about my age for the last six months.

He seems like a nice and caring, loving guy, but he lies a lot.

When we are together, he keeps sending text messages to his other female friends, and when I ask him about it, he says they are just his good friends.

Last week, I asked him if he was seeing other women, because I don't want to be with him anymore if he is.

He said he has no attraction to any other women, but he does sometimes feel attracted to men.

He told me that he used to have a male partner but that he also likes women.

In my native culture, this is very strange.

At the same time, I was hurt when he mentioned that he was with men.

I need advice from you about whether I should keep this relationship or just forget this man.

Dear Confused: If you are sexually involved with this man and he has been with other men or women, you must practice safe sex and always use a condom if you choose to be with him.

If you are with someone who lies to you and hurts your feelings, then you shouldn't be with him at all.

Sexual practices and conventions might be different in different cultures, but feelings cut across cultural boundaries. Your first and most important job is to respect yourself and to listen to and act on your own feelings and instincts.

You should also make sure you see your physician to be tested for STDs and educated about safe-sex practices.

You should be with only people who are honest with you, good to you, and respectful toward you.