Everyone knows that expressing gratitude helps ease our challenges. After all, it's hard to remain angry when you're counting the good things in life. Was your salary cut? At least you have a job in your field. Were you dumped by your boyfriend? At least you have supportive girlfriends. And so on.
Yet sometimes, blessings are less about what we have and more about what we dodged. So we gave readers the opportunity to express both in a fill-in-the-blanks exercise: "I'm grateful I experienced _______ this year, but I'm even happier that _______ passed me by."
We received more responses than we have space for, but here is a selection. Thanks for sharing, and Happy Thanksgiving.
I'm grateful that I experienced love this year, but I'm even happier that my first breakup passed me by.
Paula Meninato
Swarthmore
I'm grateful that I experienced the passage of another year - and a big birthday - by treating myself to a glorious week of practice, study, and fun at a music camp exclusively for grown-ups in Maine. I'm even happier that any serious intimations of mortality have (thus far) passed me by!
Gail Rudenstein
Wynnewood
I am grateful that I experienced studying at Cambridge University for a month this year, but I'm even happier that being trapped in the house with my sister all summer passed me by.
Leah Malamut
Rose Valley
I'm grateful I experienced life this year, but I'm even happier that the Grim Reaper passed me by.
Arthur C. Singer
King of Prussia
I'm grateful that I experienced new friendships and wonderful moments with my senior class this year, but I'm even happier that 2009 passed me by, so now I can work on my future.
Shihon Rogers
Philadelphia
I am grateful that I had experienced recording a demo with a very talented musician this year, but I am even happier that - so far - the H1N1 virus has passed me by.
P.J. Pierangeli
Wallingford
I'm grateful that I am experiencing my third clinical trial administered by the amazing, caring staff at Fox Chase Cancer Center this year, but I'm even happier that, despite Stage 4 thyroid cancer in both lungs, our dear Lord has decided that death could pass me by.
Ellie Dickerson
Drexel Hill
I'm grateful that I experienced continuing enjoyable reading of newspapers this year, but I'm even happier that negative people have passed me by.
Joe Ball
Bala Cynwyd
I'm grateful that I experienced Veterans Day without remembering the death of my father this year, but I'm even happier that my amazing memories of him have not passed me by.
Teyonnah Benson
Media
I am grateful that I experienced finding true love and happiness this year, but I'm even happier that the negative point in my life that was holding me back and slowing me down has passed me by.
Noelle Marie Voorhees
Fishtown
I am grateful that I experienced having a girlfriend for more than six months this year, but I'm even happier that family drama has passed me by.
James Vacca
Philadelphia
I'm grateful that I experienced getting my first job this year, but I'm even happier getting laid off passed me by.
Alex Hisey
Wallingford
I'm grateful I experienced living and working as an English teacher in Japan this year, but I'm even happier that my subsequent stay in a Japanese hospital passed me by.
Amanda Bryman
Cherry Hill
I'm grateful that I experienced how much my family cares and loves me through letters I received during my senior retreat, but I'm even happier that 2009 has passed me by and we are on to 2010!
Victor Fernandez
Philadelphia
I'm grateful I experienced the birth of another grandchild this year, but I'm even happier that illness passed me by.
Rita Veit
West Chester
I am grateful that I experienced a tremendous amount of support from my boyfriend this year, but I'm even happier that high school passed me by.
Melissa Mathis
Cherry Hill
I am grateful that I've experienced the gift of a new car and the love of my family members, especially my aunt, who has taken care of my brother and me since the death of my mother, but I'm even happier that giving up on myself has passed me by.
Tanica Billey
Philadelphia
I'm grateful I survived a massive heart attack that few survive, but I'm even happier that death passed me by.
Susan Cromwell
Chester Springs
I am grateful that I experienced having my daughter this year. She has brought so much joy into my life. I'm even happier that sickness in my family has passed me by.
Christina Adamoli
Philadelphia
I am grateful that I experienced getting honors for the first time, but I'm even happier that the first marking period passed me by.
Zakee Wood
Philadelphia
We're grateful that we experienced our 50th wedding anniversary this year, but we're even happier that misfortune passed us by.
Rita and Joe Seward
Woodbury, N.J.
I'm grateful that I experienced 70 this year, but I'm even happier that 17 passed me by.
Alice Poupard
Philadelphia
I am grateful that I experienced new friends this year, but I am even happier that past mistakes passed me by.
Charles Swan
Mayfair
I'm grateful I experienced being a mother returning to work after staying home with my children while they were young. As much as I love them, it felt wonderful to be reminded I'm intelligent and productive. May every mother get that opportunity. I'm even happier that the reason I returned to work was not a complete financial crisis, but a confluence of good luck.
Margaret Betz
Swarthmore
I am grateful that I experienced being able to spend time this year with a friend of my family who is no longer with us, but I am even happier that failure, hard feelings, regrets, fights, and struggles have passed me by.
Kimberly Roberts
Philadelphia
I am grateful that I experienced a
summer filled with fun this year, but
I am even happier that violence passed me by.
Jameelah White
Philadelphia
I'm grateful that I experienced losing my position of more than 31 years through downsizing, but I'm even happier that I was able to learn from this experience. I'm working again and happier than ever, and I'm not even 50. I have many years to go until I get to enjoy retired life!
Debbie MacKenzie
Philadelphia
I am grateful for my son, my grandson, and my granddaughter - they check on me two to three times a day just to make sure I am OK. But I am even happier that serious injury passed me by, even though I fell a couple of times. (Now I try to be more careful.)
Mary Stewart
Philadelphia