Scamps and thieves Molière was always one to stick a thumb in the eye of authority, which makes his Scapin the perfect object of adaptation by slapstick genius Bill Irwin and Mark O'Donnell. Even better, the Lantern Theater adds puppetry to the tale of a trickster servant who schemes to aid two young couples in their marriage plans. The show goes on at 2 p.m. today at St. Stephen's Theater, 10th and Ludlow Streets, and continues with shows at 11 a.m. and 4 p.m. Wednesday, 2 and 8 p.m. Saturday, and 2 p.m. next Sunday. Tickets are are $20 to $35. Call 215-829-0395. . . . Based on Charles Dickens' classic story of an orphan boy trying to survive in the London underworld, Lionel Bart's Oliver! is a musical masterpiece. The show goes on at 2 and 7 p.m. today at the Walnut Street Theatre, 825 Walnut St., and continues on a Tuesday-through-Sunday schedule to Jan. 10 (no show Friday). Tickets are $10 to $70. Call 215-574-3550.
Get ready We ask no questions and make no judgments about your New Year's Eve plans, but the aftermath can't be worse than the misadventures of the guys in the 2009 comedy The Hangover. Todd Phillips' film follows the misadventures of three friends who wake up after a bachelor party in Vegas, with no memory of what happened, having lost the groom (and somehow acquired a baby and a tiger - luckily, in separate rooms). In trying to retrace their steps they encounter strippers, drug dealers, doctors, angry gangsters, an angrier Mike Tyson, and even angrier police officers. Use it as a plan of what not to do on New Year's Eve (or make it your blueprint - as we said, we don't judge). The film screens at 8 p.m. at the Balcony at the Trocadero, 1003 Arch St. Tickets are $3. Call 215-922-6888.
Now hear this Driven by the visual style and intense, ethereal vocals and signing of partially deaf lead singer TL Forsberg, the Kriya Project plays powerful punk-metal. They perform at 8 p.m. at the Khyber, 56 S. Second St. Tickets are $8. Call 215-238-5888.
Jam on A super team-up - jazz-jam pianist John Medeski, pedal-steel wizard Robert Randolph, and the North Mississippi All-Stars - the Word puts out the funky gospel sound at 8 p.m. at the Theatre of Living Arts, 334 South St. Tickets are $27.50. Call 215-922-1011.
Antic athletics The troupe ComedySportz treats improv as an athletic endeavor, and for the end of the year they have a double-header. First up at 7:30 p.m. is New Year's in Brazil, in which they celebrate the arrival of 2010 in Ponta do Seixas (get a head start, beat the traffic, go to bed early), and then at 10:30 p.m. they hold their New Year's on Ice Spectacular (That's Not Really on Ice). Both shows are at the Adrienne, 2030 Sansom St. Tickets are $30; $25 for students. Call 1-877-985-2844.
Terrible three If you, like us, miss the classic TV series Mystery Science Theater 3000, lift your hearts and be glad, for the team behind the Comedy Central/Sci Fi Channel classic, including Joel Hodgson and Trace Beaulieu, have brought it back in a live, onstage format called Cinematic Titanic. For those of you who are not MSTies, the concept is simple: A hapless peon is stranded in his work station with only robots for companions and is subjected to merciless arbitrary experiments by a shadowy corporate force. OK, yeah, it sounds like your job (and ours), but this torment involves being forced to watch the worst movies ever made. Their only defense is sarcastic riffing on what transpires on-screen. For New Year's Eve, they are given three films - War of the Insects, Samson and the Seven Miracles, and Legacy of Blood - to, uh, digest. The show goes on at 7:30 p.m. at the Keswick Theatre, Easton Road and Keswick Avenue. Tickets are $52.50. Call 215-572-7650.
In clubland There was something we were meaning to do before this decade ends - oh, yeah, give it a name: We vote for the Ohs (as in "Oh great, it's over!"). Now let's welcome the Tens by going out: One of our faves, good-rocking folkie Steve Forbert, plays at 8 and 10:30 p.m. at the Tin Angel, 20 N. Second St. Tickets are $35 (early) and $45 (late). Call 215-928-0770. . . . The wild-eyed but gentle-souled country gents Hoots & Hellmouth play at 9 p.m. at the Note, 142 E. Market St., West Chester. Tickets are $20. Call 1-800-594-8499. . . . It's a raving dance-pop summit when electronica combo Lotus teams with the similarly inclined MSTRKRFT at 9:30 p.m. at the Electric Factory, 421 N. Market St. Tickets are $35. Call 215-627-1332.
Friday & Saturday
Equine art Before becoming a painter, Steve Messenger spent more than a decade working at equestrian shows. So, it's fitting that his solo exhibition focuses on dramatic, close-in portraits of horses. The show opens at the Muse Gallery, 52 N. Second St., with a reception from 5 to 8:30 p.m. on Friday, and runs through Jan. 30. Admission is free. Call 215-627-5310.
Soul man The smooth Trey Songz brings his neo-soul hip-hop to the Tower Theater, 69th and Ludlow Streets, Upper Darby at 8:30 p.m. Friday. Tickets are $20.10 and $49.50. Call 610-352-2887.
Good folk At just 18, Anthony da Costa has forged a winning combination of emo and Americana. He plays at PSALM, 5841 Overbrook Ave., at 8 p.m. Saturday. Tickets are $16. Call 215-477-7578.