Rebel actor-director

Dennis Hopper

, who died Saturday at age 74, was eulogized by fellow thesps

Jack Nicholson

and

Val Kilmer

Wednesday at a memorial Mass in Ranchos De Taos, N.M. Hopper's son,

Henry Lee

Hopper

, read from Walt Whitman's

Leaves of Grass

.

Nicholson, who costarred with Hopper in Easy Rider, described the late actor as an "an all-around guy. It was a very singular relationship I had with him, like nobody else. We were soulmates in a way. I really miss him."

Cameron: They're morons!

Why did

James Cameron

, beloved for his scary seafaring epics

Titanic

and

The Abyss

, decide to join the elite brain trust dedicated to ending the Gulf of Mexico oil-spill disaster?

"I was watching with growing horror and heartache, watching what's happening in the Gulf and thinking, 'Those morons don't know what they're doing.' " Cameron said Wednesday night at the All Things Digital conference in Rancho Palos Verdes, Calif.

Cameron said he knew he could help out, given his extensive water experience: "I know a lot of people . . . who know the engineering that's required to work at that depth. I thought, 'Let's get all the people I know together for a brainstorming session.' " The brainiacs, JC said, are preparing a report for the government.

Oil disaster: Spike Lee weighs in

Film auteur

Spike Lee

says

President

Obama

is far too calm when it comes to the oil disaster. The

Miracle at St. Anna

director told CNN on Wednesday night that it's about time Obama got steamin' mad.

"He's very calm, cool, collected. But, one time, go off!" Lee said. "If there's any one time to go off, this is it, because this is a disaster."

Robert Gibbs recently assured reporters that Obama's Zen exterior is deceptive. "I've seen rage from him. I have," said the White House press secretary.

Telling Bree's tragic tale

Twilight

demiurge

Stephenie Meyer

says her new,

Twilight

-related novella marks a radical break from the

Twilight

quartet. All four novels are told from Bella's point of view, Meyer says in a note sent to USA Today.

The action in The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner: An Eclipse Novella, due Friday at 12:01 a.m., is seen through the eyes of Bree Tanner, a newborn vampire created by Victoria as part of the bloodsucker army she sends after Edward and Bella.

"I had always wished people could read Bree's story before the movie came out," Meyer says. Bree only appears in 10 pages of Meyer's novel Eclipse. She's played by Jodelle Ferland in the Eclipse film, which opens June 30.

Pregnant? Nope. Well, maybe . . .

For the 9,087th time,

Khloe Kardashian

is (probably) not with child. The D-lister's hubby, Lakers star

Lamar Odom

, tells ESPN, "She hasn't told me if she was pregnant." But he said it with a big smile, which must mean, um, something.

In other baby nondenial denials, Nick Cannon, 29, who made his TV debut as a young lad in '98 in Nickelodeon's All That, says don't believe rumors that his beloved, Mariah Carey, 40, is pregnant. But she might be. Cannon was all cagey Thursday on his radio show (http://923now.radio.com/), telling his fans he and Mariah plan to name all their kids Mariah.

"Mariah No. 1, Boy Mariah, Man Mariah, Tall Mariah. It's gonna be a house full of people named Mariah," he said. The America's Got Talent host did confirm that the couple's beloved Jack Russell terrier, Cha Cha, is expecting.

Undenied baby news

Dances With Wolves

' heroic prancer,

Kevin Costner

, 55, and his second wife,

Christine Baumgartner Costner

, 36, on Wednesday welcomed a baby girl named

Grace Avery Costner

. Grace is Costner's seventh child, his third with Christine, a German model and handbag designer whom he wed in '04. The couple's other two kids are are

Hayes Logan

, 16 months, and

Cayden Wyatt

, 3. Costner has three children with his first wife,

Cindy Silva

:

Anne Clayton

, 25,

Lily McCall

, 23 and

Joe Tedrick

, 22. He also has a son,

Liam

, 13, with former gf

Bridget Rooney

.

John Travolta, 56, and Kelly Preston, 47, are ecstatic that they are expecting. "We tried for several years, and we didn't think it was going to happen for us," the couple tell People. "This is a miracle, and we feel blessed."

Tidbits 'n' pieces

Gary Coleman

's former lawyer tells People that despite widespread reports, the late actor and

Shannon Price

were not married at the time of Coleman's death. Fact, they've been divorced since Aug. 12, '08. . . .

Seinfeld

alum

Julia Louis-Dreyfus

is unemployed. Variety says her sitcom,

Old Christine

, which last month was canceled by CBS, hasn't been able to find a new home now that ABC has passed on it. . . .

Ashley Judd

, who just earned a master's degree at Harvard's Kennedy School of Government, will return to the big screen in

Flypaper

, says Variety. The bank heist comedy will costar

Patrick Dempsey

and

Tim Blake Nelson

. . . .

Jersey Shore

sleazoid

Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino

tells Online rag Scene Queens he has bedded 100 women since the show debuted. "I happen to be very, very good with the ladies," he says. "Women just happen to love 'The Situation,' and I love them back."

Eeewww!

. . .

Carrie Fisher

's new stage show,

Wishful Drinking

, which is playing in South Orange, N.J., will be filmed for an HBO special, the cabler says.. . . .

Zach Braff

will eschew TV for the stage this summer in the Off-Broadway comedy,

Trust

, opening Aug. 12 at Second Stage Theatre in Manhattan. . . .

Tom Cruise

and

Katie Holmes

' lovely child,

Suri

, 4, is so hip, so plugged-in, so with-it, that she has her very own iPad, Life & Style reports. Apparently, she digs its drawing and painting program.

Contact "SideShow" at sideshow@phillynews.com.

This article contains information from Inquirer wire services.