New Year's Eve is such an overwrought, over-thought-out hassle, you need a guide that provides you with the best, varied, most fascinating fare. Enjoy your night, Drink responsibly. Drive safely. You'll need your wits about you to figure out where the Mummers are this year.

Olde Bar Jose Garces hadn't said much about his purchase of the Old Original Bookbinder's since he signed its lease in October 2013. That is, until earlier this month, when he announced the spot's name, the Olde Bar; early design elements; and first event: New Year's Eve. Erich Weiss, grandson of former Bookbinder's owner John M. Taxin, will be on hand with cocktails celebrating the oyster saloon's past and future. York Street Hustle will provide big-band swing sounds.

8 p.m. The Olde Bar, 125 Walnut St. Tickets: $195 a person - open bar and food - including tax and tip. Information: www.garcesgroup.com.

Chris Tucker The comic known for acting roles in the Rush Hour series and the Philly-filmed Silver Linings Playbook returns to stand-up. Here's hoping he's funnier than the last film on that list.

8:30 p.m., Sands Bethlehem Event Center, 77 Sands Blvd., Bethlehem. Tickets: $85.50, 75.50, 59.50. Information: 800-745-3000, www.sandseventcenter.com

Noord How many celebrations, no matter what time of year, exclusively feature the tastes of Northern Europe, such as champagne and prune-braised rabbit leg or braised lamb "Kapsalon" in chili vinegar? Noord chef/co-owner Joncarl Lachman prepares wintry food for three separate seatings at his East Passyunk Avenue BYOB.

First seating, 5 p.m. three courses; second and third seatings; 6:45 and 10:30 p.m. five courses. Noord, 1046 Tasker St. at 11th. Tickets: $60 a person at 5 p.m., $75 at 6:45 and 10:30 p.m. a person. Information: 267-909-9704, www.noordphilly.com

The Geator's NYE Gala with Low Cut Connie Before releasing their still-unnamed major-label debut, Philly's wiggy rockabilly-soul outfit Low Cut Connie joins forces with local radio/sock hop icon Jerry Blavat for his annual soiree. "It's going to be weird, wild and cross-generational," says Connie's singing pianist, Adam Weiner. Plus, there's surf-and-turf dining.

9 p.m., Valley Forge Casino Resort, 1160 First Ave., King of Prussia. Tickets: $125 a person. Information: 610-354-8118, www.vfcasino.com

CSz New Year's Improvin' Eve. ComedySportz - this city's longest-running improvisational troupe - offers fans of unpredictable comic sketches two shots at hilarity with a quizzical chuckle. Plus, says CSz Philadelphia executive director Don Montrey, the gang can bring out "secret games like Spit Take and the exciting Oxygen Deprivation, in which players their head underwater while their teammates do a scene" for the holiday.

7:30 p.m. (all-ages) and 10:30 p.m. at the Playground at the Adrienne, 2030 Sansom St. Tickets: $35 for adults/$30 for students, seniors, and military members with costs covering the show, party favors, pizza, and a sparkling cider toast. Information: 1-877-985-2844, www.comedysportzphilly.com

A Baltic Affair The brassy, reedy West Philadelphia Orchestra joins forces with Philly's favorite disco lounge singer, Johnny Showcase, at Underground Arts to cook and host a Balkan feast featuring traditional dishes of Bulgaria, Serbia, and Ukraine while playing similarly themed music. The event goes until 4 a.m. with Mercury Radio Theater, You Do You, and DJ LeBeet joining in the festivities. For further adventures in Baltic music, Eugene Hutz's punk accordion-and-fiddle ensemble Gogol Bordello plays Electric Factory with Philly's equally angular Man Man onboard.

West Philadelphia Orchestra Balkan Feast, 9 p.m., Underground Arts, 1200 Callowhill St. Tickets: $30, $40 (VIP with buffet). Information: www.undergroundarts.org

Gogol Bordello/Man Man, 9 p.m., 421 N. 7th St. Tickets: $40-$100. Information: 215-627-1332, www.electricfactory.info

The 1812 Newshour There's no better way to relive the tragic events of the year than to laugh at them through the newsy Daily Show-like interpretation of 1812 Productions' This Is the Week That Is.

8 p.m., Plays & Players Theatre, 1714 Delancey St. Tickets: $26-$40. Information: 215-592-9560, www.1812productions.org

Making Time It's funny to think this two-floor, electro-futurist, sample-heavy DJ soiree started off as the most forward-thinking dance party in the city, only to become the go-to grandfather event of the scene. It's still spinners such as Russ Alexander, Dave P, Sammy Slice, Dave Pak, Mike Z, Broadzilla and friends, and it's still great.

9 p.m., Union Transfer, 1026 Spring Garden St. Tickets: $50 a person. Information: 215-232-2100, www.utphilly.com

Tommy Up's Trio Restaurateur/host Tommy Up offers his trio of Northern Liberties hot spots - PYT Burger, Emmanuelle Cocktail Parlor, and this year's new Kickstarter-approved Yachtsman Tiki Bar - for one price and a jitney ride back-and-forth from the Piazza to Frankford Avenue. You get Pickleback shots at PYT, French 75 champagne cocktail at Emmanuelle, the world's largest Pina Colada toast at Yachtsman and nibbles and jazz at all three.

9 p.m. Start at PYT, 1050 N. Hancock St. Tickets and information: 215-964-9009, www.pytphilly.com