Straight talk from poker pro: Let's flush sexism from the game

As far as Jessica Dawley is concerned, a woman's place is at the poker table.

Dawley, a 32-year-old military vet based in South Florida, is disappointed that, by most measures, only around 4 percent of people who play poker outside of "kitchen-table" games are women. She's doing something about that with her campaign to make the game more female-friendly. But, she explained during a recent stop at Philly's SugarHouse Casino, that will have to begin with a change in the mind-set of many women.

"I really hope to empower women to be independent and rely upon themselves, and to break through all the barriers, and to use their knowledge and intellect more than their sexuality," she offered while she was in town as part of the "Poker Night in America" TV taping, sponsored by online gambling site 888poker.com, at the waterfront gaming hall. (The series airs on cable's CBS Sports Network.)

"That's one of the biggest letdowns for me. I feel, as a female, we've come so far, and yet we set ourselves back so far by trying to use our sexuality to get ahead in life. If we want to be treated as equals, then try to use ammunition men would [use]."

Dawley said she understands what keeps many women from playing in casinos with the boys: "Women feel intimidated at the poker table because of the way we're treated by men."

Not so Dawley, who spent six years in the Kentucky Air National Guard, serving in such locales as Iraq and Afghanistan. She said that her "thick skin" leaves her undaunted by male players' behavior and comments like, "You belong in the kitchen," or "This is a guy's game, you don't belong here."

"I give it right back to them," she said, "but, unfortunately, other females shy away from that. I can understand that. You're going there to have a good time, and you get berated at the table."

That view was seconded by Raye Ramsey, SugarHouse's poker-room manager. Although Ramsey's position may seem paradoxical, online research suggests that women commonly hold that job.

"I do think there's room for more women to play," said Ramsey, who spent 10 years supervising the card parlor at Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa, in Atlantic City, before joining SugarHouse in 2013. "I think, as an industry, we have to make them feel comfortable when they come in the room.

"When I see a woman come into the room, or a women calls on the phone, I try to make them feel as comfortable as possible."

For Dawley, whose lifetime earnings "at the felt," according to various poker websites, tally up to about $135,000, one solution to issues of inequality at the table can be found in cyberspace.

"Online, [there is] anonymity," she said. "When you're playing online, you can [choose] any [screen name] you want. You can choose 'Billy Bob.' You can have an even playing field."

She and two fellow full-time players, Marsha Wolak and Natasha Barbour, have a website, epicpokertraining.com, whose mission statement is, in part, "to empower players to excel in poker."

Although the site is open to men and women, there is a section called "Femme Fatale," which is a ladies-only tutorial. Dawley's goal is to expand the number of "live" female players to 25 or 30 percent from the current 4 percent rate.

For that to happen, though, she believes that casinos will have to go all-in on creating an atmosphere that women find welcoming. "I'm trying to get casinos to be more female-friendly, to not have the sexualized cocktail waitresses or sexualized massage therapists [who provide back, neck and shoulder rubs to players at the tables].

"And when men do [harass] a female at the table, to [have] someone stand up to them and say, 'Hey! This is inappropriate. This won't be tolerated.'

"Unfortunately, to date, this has not been the case, because, unfortunately, sex sells. And because the market is 96 percent men, they're catering to the 96 percent."

Perhaps men are simply afraid to make poker more accessible to women? Dawley believes that women have some natural advantages. "Women are more analytical, right off the bat. I was an intelligence analyst in the National Guard. And women, by far, in my opinion, made better analysts.

"Also, we're not driven by ego. We have no ego. We don't go on tilt and get in arguments and lose our money because our egos are bigger than us. That's a huge advantage."

As such, she promised, the "golden age" of women's poker is on the horizon.

"I think they can be every bit as prominent as men, and more," she insisted. "They don't have the leaks like guys do. You don't see them tipping the cocktail waitresses $200, because we have no intentions with the cocktail waitresses. You don't see us getting drunk and stupid and falling over at the table. We just take it a lot more seriously."