You know there's something seriously wrong when

Charlie Sheen

has the moral high ground! Sheen tells TMZ he is happy his kids with ex-wife

Brooke Mueller

were removed from her custody by California authorities because they suspected her of using drugs at home.

Four-year-old twins Bob and Max are staying with Charlie's other ex-wife, Denise Richards, while Brooke, 35, is under investigation. But Brooke decided to take the initiative: Her rep tells the New York Daily News she is entering "a residential treatment facility to get help for prescription drug abuse." Brooke's been around the block a few times: TMZ says this will be her 20th rehab!

Says her rep, "Brooke misses her children, and wants to get healthy so she can . . . get back to being a mom."

90 days in prison for Lauryn Hill

Fugees singer Lauryn Hill, 37, was sentenced Monday in a Newark, N.J., court to three months in prison and an additional three months of home confinement for tax evasion.

The South Orange, N.J., resident was found guilty of failing to pay taxes for about $1 mil in earnings.

Hill told the court she never intended to defraud the government.

"I needed to be able to earn so I could pay my taxes, without compromising the health and welfare of my children, and I was being denied that," she said. Her attorney said Hill already has paid $970,000 to satisfy the state and federal tax liabilities.

Miley Cyrus is hot on a hot list

Not sure that dad Billy Ray Cyrus would approve! His 20-year-old actor-singer gal Miley Cyrus claims she's been placed atop Maxim mag's Hot 100, that lascivious, near-naked heap that ranks women as consumer meat for men acting like dogs.

Maxim won't confirm the leak.

Miley says she's honored.

In the very first Instagram of her career - it shows her slithery on the floor in a light cream swimsuit - she gushes, "[my] first Instagram is dedicated to all my fans. Thank you for crowning me #1 Maxim Hot 100."

P!nk: I took a sick day

Local heroine P!nk is angry. I mean steaming mad. She was accused of malingering late last month when she pulled out of a Birmingham, England, concert citing illness. The British tabs have excoriated her as a Brit hater!

Monday, P!nk posted a retort on her website: "I am a human being, therefore I am able to catch illness," she says. "It is beyond my control - and I can't apologize for that." She adds: "And you know what I've been performing through the last week? ROTA virus. Look it up. I challenge any one of you to do what I do while sick with that." There, haters!

Lovestyles of the rich 'n' famous

The apparent rift that apparently shattered the apparent love-relation between Kim Kardashian and Kanye West apparently has been repaired.

The couple was seen going to Vogue editor-in-chief Anna Wintour's New York pad Sunday night for what Us Weekly calls "an intimate dinner."

And as anyone who knows anything about love knows, couples do not have intimate meals with Ms. Wintour unless their relationship is perfect. OK?

Us Weekly also claims Kim's ex-, Kris Humphries, partied hard the night before his team, the Brooklyn Nets, lost a playoff game to the Chicago Bulls.

Tidbits 'n' pieces

Atlanta police are investigating a report by CNN anchor Carol Costello that two teens nabbed her iPhone while she was in mid-conversation! . . . Three publishing houses on Monday confirmed they've been approached for a book deal for a memoir by Jason Collins, the first active NBA player to come out of the closet as a gay man. . . . American Idol runner-up Crystal Bowersox and husband musician Brian Walker tell People they are splitting up after two and a half years of marriage.

Casting Mr. Rogers movie

A film is in the works about Fred McFeely Rogers, the Latrobe, Pa.-born Presbyterian minister, songwriter, author, and host of the beloved children's TV show Mister Rogers' Neighborhood.

"His keen ability to find the good in anyone, or anything, will make for a truly inspiring cinematic experience," said producer Justin Nappi.

So who should play the educator, who died in 2003 at age 74?

Respondents to a People.com poll were most positive about Matthew Broderick, Steve Carell (he's too ironic!), and Ty Burrell. Al Pacino does not seem to have made the cut.

Journey to journey to A.C.

Rascal Flatts and Journey have added a new tour stop: They'll play Boardwalk Hall in Atlantic City on Aug. 4. Tix go on sale Friday at 10 a.m. Info: 1-800-736-1420 or www.ticketmaster.com.

Contact "SideShow" at sideshow@inquirer.com. This column contains information from Inquirer wire services.