BERNIE MADOFF may have illegally made off with billions of dollars, but at an auction of Bernie's belongings at his former Palm Beach mansion, one bidder legally made off with his underwear.
According to the Miami Herald, 14 pairs of boxer shorts confiscated from the former swindler - Bernie's lawyers had all the briefs - sold for a total of $200.
Most of the stuff up for grabs were household items - Bernie must have had an awesome shredder - but there were also shoes, antique golf clubs and art.
More than $400,000 was raised for Madoff victims - the equivalent of a microscopic organism on a drop in the bucket.
* Also auctioning off belongings over the weekend was another slimy businessman, J.R. Ewing - but Ewing was fictional.
Larry Hagman, who played the conniving oil baron on the hit 1980s series "Dallas," auctioned off many of his personal valuables Saturday in Beverly Hills.
Caroline Galloway, of Julien's Auctions, said a silver saddle sold for $80,000.
Other big items included a portrait of Hagman's co-star Jim Davis that went for more than $38,000, a replica bottle from Hagman's earlier series "I Dream of Jeannie" that brought in more than $10,000, and a pair of pistols that fetched more than $4,000.
The Hagman collection brought in more than $500,000.
* Fortunately for out-of-control jet-skier Sean Kingston, after he crashed into a Miami bridge he was pulled out of the water.
But that doesn't mean he's out of hot water.
TMZ.com reports that Kingston's crack-up last weekend occurred in a manatee zone, and Florida state law prohibits speeding in manatee zones.
Please don't wake the manatee.
If Kingston is found in violation of the manatee law, he could be fined up to $32,500.
BANGShowbiz. com and Daily News wire services contributed to this report.