Q: This guy and I took a break from our relationship. During that time, we had no contact with each other. No texting or anything. But still, I felt like we were together. Anyway, after two months, we got back together. We talked about it, and he told me he had sex with one of his guy friends. He said it happened just once and that he's not gay. But I can't get the idea of him being with another man out of mind. I try to get him to talk about it but he won't.
Mia: Technically, it's not cheating if you're on a break and one of you has sex with another person. So, scratch that element out of the equation. What you should be more concerned with is protecting yourself from any sexually transmitted diseases your partner may have picked up. You also need to decide if you're OK with a man whose gender preference may be sexually fluid.
Steve: The fact he won't talk about having gay sex is not a good sign. He may be conflicted. Or bisexual. That could pose problems down the road. You need a frank, open conversation. If he declines, suggest counseling.
Q: I'm about halfway finished knitting a sweater for the man I've been seeing, but my roommate says I shouldn't give it to him because of the Sweater Curse: If I give it to him, we'll break up. I didn't know about that when I started making him the sweater. To me, it felt like a nice thing to do. Now she's got me nervous. I was planning to give it to him on our six-month anniversary in a few weeks. I don't want to lose him.
Mia: A prolific knitter I know swears by the so-called Sweater Curse. But don't you dare fall for that old yarn. If you want to give that man a sweater that you worked so darn hard on, do it. If the dude dumps you, then your relationship was going to unravel anyway.
Forget about the curse. Instead, put those knitting needles down and ask yourself how solid a relationship you have if you're this easily spooked by what someone says.
Steve: Knitting a sweater is hard work. I'd suggest getting him to sign a prenup for the sweater so that if you do break up you get it back.