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Family puts her through shear torture

Somefamily members are now furious with me for getting my hair done by someone who is soon to be a relative’s ex.

DEAR ABBY: For 17 years I have been using the same hairstylist, "Marietta," because she does great cuts and color. She's married to my cousin "Gil," but not for long. They're divorcing.

Gil's mother suggested that I should find a different stylist, but when I did, I had horrible results. I returned to Marietta and it took her several appointments to correct my color.

Some family members are now furious with me for getting my hair done by someone who is soon to be a relative's ex. I look at it as a business. I like what Marietta does for me. We never discuss the divorce. Family is now demanding an apology, and I don't think I owe one. I haven't been close to any of these people in years.

Must I say I'm sorry to distant family and discontinue Marietta's services? Or should I say nothing and continue my professional relationship with her? My roots are beginning to show again, so please answer quickly.

- Snipped in California

DEAR SNIPPED: Tell Gil's mother to stay out of your hair. You tried leaving Marietta; it was a disaster - and you plan on using her until the day you curl up and dye.

DEAR ABBY: I was involved in a fatal car accident in 2012. Two of my best friends died. There is a void in my heart. They were 15 and 18. I feel so much pain over the loss of my friends, and it is never going to end or hurt less. Their families hate me, which is to be expected.

I am in prison and feel so depressed. Time here seems to barely move. How do I deal with this pain and my sentence?

- In Jail and Hurting

DEAR HURTING: If possible, use your time in prison to complete your education. If there are classes, take them. If there is a library, use it. You can make the walls around you disappear if you lose yourself in the pages of a book. Try it, and you will see that I'm right.

DEAR ABBY: My in-laws double dip everything. During a holiday get-together, a family member stood eating out of a pot. Now my M-I-L informs me that her daughter allows her dog to eat off the plates, but "she uses a dishwasher," so I shouldn't worry about germs.

How do I handle this? I can't eat there again.

- Grossed Out in Grosse Point

DEAR GROSSED OUT: Eat before you go, and go as infrequently as possible.