Hello there
It was October 2007, and Sue, who had moved to Philadelphia the year before to study biology at Temple University, decided to volunteer at OutFest, an annual gay/ lesbian/bisexual/transgender pride celebration held in Center City.
Sue, who grew up in the Scranton area, was assigned to "stand in front of a mountain of tables and chairs" and distribute them to the vendors. Since she arrived at 8 a.m., Sue was put in charge of the project.
A group of teenage girls was assigned to help, but soon disappeared - Sue later spotted the group at Starbucks. There also was a well-intentioned drag queen who was hampered by her stiletto heels. And then there was Lisa. "She was the person I kept sending to carry things over and over and over. She never complained," Sue said.
Lisa would later confess that her hard work was, in part, to get Sue to notice her. At first, it didn't really work. "I didn't really have time to notice. There was an onslaught," Sue said. But then, during a slow period, Sue and Lisa sat down on the sidewalk to take a break. "She started asking me questions, like, if I was single or not," said Sue. "And right there, I thought, 'She's going to ask me out by the end of the day. And I'm going to say yes.' "
After the volunteer stint was finished, Lisa, who is now 23 and grew up in Drexel Hill, asked Sue, now 23, to get lunch and explore the festival. Later, Lisa asked Sue on a date.
The plan was that Lisa would drive to Sue's place. They would make plans from there. But as the two were talking, Sue got a call from her roommate, Dave. His unreliable car had broken down, and he was stuck. Sue didn't have a car, but at Dave's prodding, she asked if Lisa would take her to fetch the roommate. He's bad at giving directions, so it took a long time to even find him. "We went back to my apartment, and it was too late to go out," Sue said. "But I really realized this [new relationship with Lisa] could go somewhere."
How does forever sound?
"We had been talking about getting married for a while, but it was just talking," Sue remembered. "Then we were in the mall, and [Lisa] pulled me into a jewelry store." Sue was oohing and aahing over many rings that summer day in 2009, but as soon as she settled on her favorite, Lisa bought it, then and there.
"I'm not telling you when I'm proposing. I want it to be a surprise," Lisa told Sue. But she didn't hold out long.
That night, the couple was at Sue's apartment, watching a movie, and Lisa asked Sue to marry her.
They told people they were engaged, but set no date.
Then last fall, the two were at their South Philadelphia home when Lisa read a blurb in the Philadelphia Gay News about a contest for gay couples looking to tie the knot. The prize? An all-expense-paid commitment ceremony. "You should write an essay," Lisa said. "All right," said Sue. "I will!"
The winners were supposed to be announced in November, so when December arrived without any news, Sue figured the contest had been canceled because of the economy. Then she got a call from Gene Bloom, event coordinator at Provence Catering, sponsor of the contest. Sue and Lisa had won.
Provence Catering co-owner Michael Yatvin hopes Sue and Lisa's wedding marks the start of something big: National Commitment Day - a name Provence has trademarked - that will honor loving couples who can't legally be married because of state laws. The goal is that gay and lesbian weddings will be given away annually - in the future, on the first Saturday in March. Gene is already working on next year's Philadelphia event.
When it comes to love, gender shouldn't matter, Gene said. "Hopefully there's going to be a time in this country where we're not going to need a National Commitment Day."
It was so them
Because everything was donated, Sue and Lisa didn't have many choices to make. But what's amazing, Sue said, is that their wedding was pretty much exactly what they would have selected themselves, including a photo booth and wine with personalized labels. "Everyone talked about the photo booth and the champagne lady," Sue said.
The champagne lady was Sandy O of the Creative Juice Group. "She was lying across the bar, wearing a gold lamé dress and a bubble hat," Sue said. But that's not all. Ms. O had a jug of champagne, and when someone wanted some, she stuck her white-gloved hand into the jug, and then, mysteriously, shot the champagne out of her fingers into their glass.
"I was fascinated," Lisa said.
Where the couple did get to personalize was on the most important part: the ceremony.
Lisa's late grandparents, Albert and Eleanor, were honored by officiant Maria Odilia Romeu. "I also had a picture of my grandparents taken on their 40th anniversary that sat next to our cake," Lisa said.
About 130 guests attended the ceremony and reception, at the Chestnut Club in Center City. The couple invited 55 of them, and the rest were people involved in the event. "Just the ability to have all of our friends and family there is meaningful in itself," Sue said. "I'm a student. I bring in zero income. Even if we waited until after I graduated, we could not have had nearly as many people as we could through this event."
At work
Sue is scheduled to graduate from Temple in August. She is applying to master's programs in health sciences. Lisa is a manager at Five Guys who splits her time between stores in Cherry Hill and Deptford, but within months will transfer to a Delaware store.
This was a surprise
Lisa was bowled over by the ceremony setup. The guests sat in a circle, surrounding the couple and the officiant. "I loved it," Lisa said. The arrangement allowed her to look out at many different family members and friends during the ceremony.
Awestruck
Lisa choked up as Sue walked down the aisle toward her. "I knew what was going on, but it didn't really hit me until I saw her," Lisa said. "I turned to Maria and said, 'I'm going to need some tissues.' "
Sue was thrilled that her brother and sister-in-law made the trip from Scranton to share the day. Much of her family lives far away, she said. "Just having some of my family there meant a great deal," she said. Sue was also overjoyed to be welcomed into Lisa's family by her mother and aunts. "They were pulling me into pictures, and saying, 'You're one of us now. Congratulations!' "
Discretionary spending
The whole thing was a bargain, since the couple didn't have to pay for it.
The getaway
Sue and Lisa cannot afford a honeymoon right now, but they are saving for a trip to Australia.StartText
Behind the Scenes
Officiant
Maria Odilia Romeu of Journeys of the Heart
Venue
The Chestnut Club, Philadelphia
Catering
Provence Catering, Jeffersonville, Pa.
Photography
Alyssa Maloof of Alyssa Maloof Photography, Philadelphia
Music
East Coast Events & Entertainment, Philadelphia; and Amy Evaninger, classical guitar, piano, and vocals, who is based in Dover, Del.
Invitations
Evites
Flowers
Natural Designs Floral, Jeffersonville, Pa.
Planner
Gene Bloom, director of planning and events at Provence Catering
Other vendors
Shutter Booth Photo Booths, Franks Union Wine Mart, New Hope Winery, Select Event Rental & Cindi Bene, Eventions Productions Lighting, Eco-Bar, Ice Concepts, and Sandy O of Creative Juice Group
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Do You Have the Date?
Tell us in a short e-mail – at least six weeks before your ceremony – why we should feature your love story. Send it to weddings@phillynews.com. Unfortunately, we can't personally respond to all submissions. If your story is chosen, you will be contacted in the weeks before your wedding.
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With This Ring - Which Ring?
This week, it's up to you to choose the Safian & Rudolph wedding bands that Lifetime Wedding Giveaway winners Matt & Faye will place on each other's hands at the Independence Seaport Museum on May 23. Go to www.philly.com/mattandfaye to browse photos of the sets and to pick your favorite.
Next week's vote: The cake.EndText