As a weekend visitor, try to set aside time for no devices, just talk

Question: I will be visiting a good friend in another state and staying three nights. The last time I stayed, which was in the spring, she spent a lot of time on her laptop and told me she had 15 games of Scrabble going on with other people. The TV is always on, and it makes it hard to talk and visit. Am I just being too sensitive? I have always enjoyed her friendship, and we have had a lot of fun together, but this isn't fun. Maybe I should just not visit any longer.

- Dolores in Pennsylvania
Answer: I would side with you on this one, even though not everyone would. When someone visits, the host needs to spend time with the person, but the guest also needs to give the host time for his or her normal routine. Maybe you could find some ways to engage your friend away from the computer. Take her out to dinner and say, "Let's not bring any electronics, so we can really talk." But I would also bring a book or something you like to do so that she has time to live her normal life, too.

Technology has really challenged the boundaries of etiquette in so many ways. A lot of people think they are not being rude by conversing while playing Scrabble on the phone. But it's really in the eye of the person on the other end. I can't answer a text and listen to the person sitting next to me at the same time. Maybe others can. I suggest you give your friend some tech time and also ask her kindly for some one-on-one time.

Q: Over Christmas, I was happy my family came to stay, but they stayed and stayed and stayed. How does one politely let guests know it's time to leave? I considered telling them I had a very contagious disease, and it was time for them to pack up.

- Margaret in New Jersey
A: As much as I would like to answer this question myself, I think it can best be addressed by the Dowager Countess on Downton Abbey, played brilliantly by Maggie Smith. Her quote on the subject is: "No guest should be admitted without the date of their departure settled."

Next visit, give a beginning and end time. While we are on that subject, always do the same for children's birthday parties. Many years ago, as a naïve young parent, I sent invitations for a 1 p.m. party with no end time. The last child was picked up at 6 p.m.

Several readers have complained to me about rudeness by TSA employees at Philadelphia International Airport and have asked why they are so brusque.

I recently flew from Philadelphia to Tampa and noticed a difference in volume and sometimes tone between the TSA staff in our fair city and our Southern friends. However, the Philadelphia security line had a lot more people, and while I never think rudeness is acceptable, I also understand that this is a high-stress job and that one mistake could cost the lives of many people, so I am willing to let a little abrupt behavior go.

While some of the shouting in Philadelphia was probably due to the volume of passengers, I will say to the employees that an occasional smile would go a long way. I also will add that they seemed to be kind and caring to elderly passengers and those in wheelchairs. We have to take into account that there are many employees, so there can always be a few who need to brush up on their manners.

While we are on the subject of air travel, should cellphone conversations be allowed on planes? Right now, it looks as if the ban will stay in place, but that could change. I see many etiquette offenses at 35,000 feet, if that occurs. Your thoughts?