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Ask Sir Charles

Try clutter to befuddle pack rat

Q: My husband is a pack rat, and it’s gotten to the point where I’m actually getting worried about it. It’s not like we have junk overflowing in our basement or anything, but he seems increasingly incapable of throwing anything out — or letting me throw anything out. Any advice on how to get him to literally clean up his act?

— An anti-horder in Mount Airy

A: As somebody who’s never thrown out a vacuum cleaner you’re probably asking the wrong dude. But my best advice is to befuddle him with clutter. When he’s asleep in bed, you can good naturedly put a few boxes and stacks of magazines and maybe an old tennis racquet for good measure on your side of the bed and give him a little surprise when he rolls over. Sometimes you have to resort to extreme measures—but in a nice way—to get a point across. Maybe get him a storage locker for his birthday. Or a dumpster for an anniversary gift. Hopefully he’ll get the message. If not, do you want to buy a used vacuum cleaner?

Q: Why do you think so many professional athletes have an affinity for smoking marijuana. Is it because they consider it less harmful than alcohol or tobacco?

— Curious in Conshohocken

A: Dude, that’s a terrible question. Why single out professional athletes? Do you know that for a fact? You know what they say about making assumptions, it makes an ass out of you and ... well, you know. People from all walks of life do drugs in general and smoke marijuana in particular. The health and social risks are well documented but still people insist in partaking. While you think marijuana is less harmful than alcohol or tobacco that isn’t necessarily true either. You can just as easily lose your inhibitions if you’re high as if you’re drunk and do something stupid. That’s why they call it dope. It’s best to maintain a healthy lifestyle whether you’re an athlete or a columnist for SportsWeek or anything in between.

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