DEAR ABBY: On our last date, "Chris" told me he was a virgin and that it was important for him to find a girl who had "never been with anyone." Well, that bridge was burned when I was a teenager. I am a different person now due to a religious conversion and am waiting until I am married to have sex again. I told Chris this, and asked if he wanted to continue the relationship. He said he'd "have to think about it." I now feel devalued. I have strong opinions about men who sing "Amazing Grace" in church while insisting on marrying virgins.
- Deflowered in Pennsylvania
DEAR "DEE": Cross Chris off your list as husband material. He may be self-conscious about his inexperience or old-fashioned values.
DEAR ABBY: I had a teen pregnancy and my parents sent me away to live with relatives. My parents raised "Jacob" as their own, adopted him and never hid the fact that I am his biological mother. Eventually everyone in my family moved to where I live, including my son, whom I treat as a younger brother. I am now the mother of 2-year-old twins. Jacob adores the girls and sees them often. I don't know how to explain Jake to them. No one outside my family knows. I never got the chance to be a mother to Jacob, but I would like to be a good one for my girls.
- Just Call Me Brianna
DEAR BRIANNA: Your daughters are not likely to ask questions about Jacob for many years to come. Simply say that when Jacob was born, you were very young and unable to provide for him financially - which is why your parents adopted and raised him as their own. It's the truth. End of story. *