Learning isn’t just academic. Here are the ways the pandemic can aid in your child’s brain development. | Expert Opinion

Parenting a school-aged child has become harder than ever. With blended roles at home, parents have become teachers, counselors, playmates, and disciplinarians. And we still don’t really know how this will change the educational trajectory for our children. The U.S. Department of Education recently announced the National Assessment of Educational Progress 2021 School Survey project, designed to gather data to “better determine the impact of remote learning on kids.” But what should parents do in the meantime?

At one point, 93% of people in households with school-aged children reported that their children engaged in some form of “distance learning.” As a parent myself, I can attest to the challenges this has created. Parents are struggling to balance their jobs and help their children. With shortened days, hybrid schedules, and virtual learning, some kids are getting by, but others are drowning. Parents are seeing increased behavioral and emotional outbursts.

How can parents cope? Stop worrying about academic learning for these kids and start thinking about teaching adaptive, coping, social-emotional, and cognitive skills. We need to show our kids how to think about something as difficult as a pandemic. We must teach them how to reframe their thinking about the negative impact of COVID-19 toward a focus on what we can control.

COVID-19 has provided the ultimate teachable moment to aid in your child’s brain development. We can use this to build the brain skills we apply to academics, teach coping and adaptive skills, and help our children develop abstract thinking and analysis skills. Parents should remember the following tips when shifting their approach during this pandemic.

Learning isn’t just academic. We don’t have a reading or math part of our brain. We have skills and abilities that we apply to the subjects of reading and math. Focus on helping your child build executive skills.

The very nature of remote learning challenges our students to find their own virtual classrooms, keep track of their assignments, plan their own day/projects. Because teachers and students do not always have daily contact between classes, students often don’t have a teacher to guide them through the organizational aspects of learning.

You can help your children develop the skills necessary to complete these tasks on their own and become more independent. Set calendar reminders in their phone, help them make written schedules to follow, work with them to develop a plan for their assignments.

Coping and adaptation must be taught. Our kids need to learn how to manage “bad” or difficult things when they happen. They need to be taught how to reframe and reboot. Think about how you have managed your emotions during this time.

Talk about your emotions around your children. Provide a model for the expression and management of emotions. Talk about what you’re feeling and how you’re managing those thoughts.

Speaking of managing emotions, think about how you focused your energy during this time. Did you find a new hobby? Did you reconnect with old friends through Zoom? Did you take some time for introspection and determine what is important in your life? It’s important to help your child find this path, too. We often wait until we write college essays or a resumé to see ourselves on paper. Use this time to help your child develop some insight and self-reflection skills.

Teaching the “how” in “how I think and feel” is important. It’s our job to help kids understand what they’re reading, learn how to analyze and compare viewpoints, and decide how they want to feel about it.

Teach your children how to think. Help them compare and contrast the information they’re hearing. Help them identify reliable sources vs. “fake” sources. Talk about how you’re making decisions about your family’s health. Talking out your problem-solving process will help your child learn how to do it for themselves.

The world has become a place full of unknowns. Our kids can struggle to learn and grow when they don’t understand how to approach their learning, how to cope with difficult life situations, and how to analyze and think abstractly about the world. Use COVID-19 as a teachable moment for your kids and teach them that there’s more to life than academics.

Sarah Allen is a pediatric neuropsychologist nicknamed the “Brain Gal,” who is on a mission to help parents raise happy brains. She specializes in teaching people how to use brain science to their advantage. Contact her at drallen@brainbehaviorbridge.com or 609-230-8792.