What happened to DA Fani Willis is a reminder to be careful about workplace romances

I’ve never dated a work colleague.

But as a Black professional woman, I can’t help but feel for the difficult situation Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis recently found herself in, leading up to dramatic courtroom testimony about her love life.

For anyone not caught up on this courtroom drama: Willis is the prosecutor pursuing charges that former President Donald Trump interfered with the 2020 election in Georgia. The defense asked to dismiss the indictment or disqualify Willis from the case because she had a romantic relationship with Nathan Wade, the special prosecutor on the case.

During a hearing investigating whether Willis committed misconduct, she testified sharply on her behalf. “Do you think I’m on trial? These people are on trial for trying to steal an election in 2020. I’m not on trial no matter how hard you try to put me on trial,” she said.

» READ MORE: Fani Willis is doing her job. For Black women in America, that’s enough to earn them scorn. | Solomon Jones

I’m married and have been for nearly two decades. I’m not privy to Willis’ personal life, but I still recognize how many African American women face huge obstacles when they try and excel in workspaces traditionally reserved for white men and even think about trying to date.

The process of maneuvering into positions of power like the one Willis occupies can throw a person’s work-life balance seriously out of whack. Then, once ensconced, finding romantic partners of equal education and accomplishment is often daunting. Also, in such a high-pressure job, you spend most of your time at work, and even so-called workaholics need love and human connection. We all do.

So it should be no surprise that an estimated 60% of adults have had workplace romances, according to Forbes Advisor.

So let’s take this opportunity to remind people of something they should already know: Be very careful when deciding to date a colleague, especially if it’s a direct report. Dating a subordinate is asking for trouble, particularly when the stakes are as high as they are for Willis’ prosecution of Trump.

Dating a subordinate is asking for trouble.

Willis is a highly intelligent and accomplished woman. She knew better than most not to even entertain the idea of getting involved romantically with Wade, whom she hired to help her prosecute the case against Trump and his codefendants. Back in 2020, when Willis was on the campaign trail, she was videotaped saying, “I certainly will not be choosing people to date who work under me.” If only she’d stuck to that.

Trump’s defense team, no doubt, was thrilled to discover the so-called clandestine affair between her and Wade and tried their best to get Willis disqualified and thrown off the case, which could jeopardize the entire prosecution.

It will be a long time before the nation forgets the riveting sight of Willis on that witness stand, sharing intimate details about her private life. I was vacationing in Arizona at the time and was supposed to be out mountain climbing, but stayed inside just to watch the drama unfold.

On Friday, Judge Scott McAfee ruled that the case could continue with Willis at the helm as long as Wade resigned — which he has done “in the interest of democracy,” as he put it. McAfee also came down hard on Willis, criticizing her lapse in judgment, but pointed out that Trump’s lawyers hadn’t proved enough of a conflict of interest to merit stopping the case against Trump from going forward.

But that wasn’t the end of things. Trump’s lawyers filed court papers earlier this week to try and appeal the judge’s decision not to disqualify Willis or dismiss the charges against their client. On Wednesday, McAfee ruled the appeal could proceed.

In other words, yet another unfortunate delay. Meanwhile, the November presidential election inches even closer.

So although I sympathize with Willis’ situation, I wish she had followed her own rule about not dating in the workplace. Everyone involved in the case against Trump must hold themselves to the highest standards, “in the interest of democracy,” as Wade noted. At this moment in our country’s history, there is too much at stake.