Well, this is certainly a motley crew Dr. Drew has assembled for the new season of Celebrity Rehab, which begins June 26 on VH1.
Among the troupe checking in to the Pasadena Recovery Center are actress Sean Young (Blade Runner) and Michael Lohan, the celebrity-seeking father of Lindsay. (Hey, does Dr. Drew offer family discounts?)
The title of the reality show has never seemed more dubious. How much recovery work is really possible in an environment where you're being circled 24/7 by camera crews? Not too intrusive. "OK, let's talk about your traumatic childhood. Wait, your nose is shining. Makeup!"
And you have to question how many of the participants really qualify as celebrities.
For the fifth season, the lineup includes Survivor castoff Jessica "Sugar" Kiper, Chinese actress Bai Ling, Amy Fisher, the so-called Long Island Lolita who shot Joey Buttafuoco's wife, Jeremy Jackson, who played David Hasselhoff's son on Baywatch and former pitcher for the New York Mets, Dwight "Doc" Gooden (Is he allowed to write his own prescriptions?)
Rounding out the cast is a returning favorite, Steve Adler, who was drummed out of the band Guns N' Roses. Adler is a Celebrity Rehab alum who then got thrown off the sequel, Sober House, for missing the whole point of the exercise.
I think of Celebrity Rehab as the last saloon, a sad and desperate attempt to get – if not publicity – then at least attention.
Oh wait, the last time we saw Sean Young was on Skating with the Stars. So there are worse alternatives. That show made Celebrity Rehab look like Hollywood Squares.