ESPN's updated fantasy baseball player rater has an interesting omission: Any Phillies, at all. There are none in the top 10. There are none in the top 20. There are none in the top 50.

And while fantasy baseball is different from real baseball, it is based on the output of real players, of which the Phillies have 24 (Chad Durbin is still on the roster).

Chase Utley's your batting average leader (.272), and he's out indefinitely. That drops the team high to John Mayberry's .262. Dom Brown's OPS sets the bar at .770 (again, eclipsed by Utley at .814), but he's second behind Ryan Howard in strikeouts at 34. Howard has already won that race, sitting at 54 K's and counting, unless somebody, I don't know, finally just puts him on the DL instead of forcing him to play in constant pain.

Ben Revere, whose main asset is his speed, has an unimpressive OBP (.300) and an absent slugging percentage (not worth mentioning), making him... just... a nonentity.

Also, Cole Hamels' WAR is in the negatives (-0.2).

With the team this bad, what is there to even tweet about?
Oh, right.