IT'S THE MARK of a great publicist when he or she can still place an item when the premise of that item is refuted in the very same item.
For example, if we said, "Justin Timberlake plans to tour with One Direction" in our provocative lead but in the second paragraph said "but Timberlake's busy touring and movie schedule makes such a pairing unlikely," that would be a brilliant item.
Totally bogus, but filled with search-word favorites for lots of Google clicks.
That one we made up. This one we didn't.
Christopher Nolan of "Inception" and "The Dark Knight" trilogy fame, is in "informal talks," according to the London Daily Mail, to direct the next James Bond movie.
How awesome would that be?
On the other hand, Tattle is in informal talks to date Jennifer Lawrence. They're so informal that they're not even with Jennifer, but with our friend Bob, in Detroit.
Nolan is a tremendous writer-director-producer, so we have no doubt that he can juggle many balls at once, but the problem with the story is that he already has a full plate, and Bond movies aren't low-budget indies you can squeeze into two free months in your schedule.
Nolan is already in the pre-production phase of "Interstellar," a brainy sci-fi film about physics starring Anne Hathaway, Jessica Chastain and Matthew McConaughey, and that will keep him busy into 2014. If the next Bond is to come out in 2016, he would have to start work on that while he's finishing up his own movie.
It's doable, but in the meantime, "Interstellar" and James Bond get a little early ink.
* In similar, but completely unrelated, news, days after Selena Gomez declared that she was definitely single, she got cozy with ex-BF Justin Bieber in Las Vegas and sat next to him at the Billboard Music Awards.
Are they? Aren't they? Oooh.
* Oh, and Beyonce is pregnant again.
No, she isn't.
Yes, she is.
Sources confirm it.
Beyonce denies it.
Ah, but she is on tour and hubby Jay-Z is going on tour and those tickets don't sell themselves.
* Simon Cowell has let Tattle down again.
Given the chance to right a wrong and bring Cheryl Cole to judge the U.S. "X Factor," he has instead gone with Kelly Rowland and Paulina Rubio.
TMZ.com says that the deal will be finalized in the next few days.
* A Los Angeles sheriff's spokesman says that "Terminator 2" star Edward Furlong has been arrested on suspicion of violating a restraining order filed by his ex-girlfriend.
Always-working sheriff's spokesman Steve Whitmore said that deputies responding to the scene Thursday in West Hollywood found Furlong hiding in a nearby property
Jail records show that he was released Saturday just after noon after being held on $100,000 bail.
Yo, Ed, the only place you want to see the phrase "beaten by a Furlong" is in a story about a horse race.
* Denmark's Emmelie de Forest has won this year's Eurovision Song Contest with her ethno-inspired flute and drum tune "Only Teardrops," despite tough competition from spectacular stage shows by performers from Azerbaijan and Ukraine.
Juries and television viewers across Europe awarded the barefoot de Forest for the catchy love song that is driven by her deep voice.
The glitzy music battle also featured a bizarre opera-pop number from Romania, the comeback of "Total Eclipse of the Heart" star Bonnie Tyler and an Armenian rock song written by the guitarist of Black Sabbath.
Sounds way more fun than "American Idol" or "The Voice."
* The lawyer for As I Lay Dying frontman Tim Lambesis, who's accused of trying to hire someone to kill his estranged wife, says that the singer's mind has been ravaged by steroid use.
U-T San Diego reports that the detail came to light during a Friday hearing for Lambesis, who has pleaded not guilty to solicitation for murder. A judge at the hearing reduced Lambesis' bail from $3 million to $2 million.
We guess a name change to As I Lay Dying With Shriveled Up Testicles is out of the question.
* Justin Bieber will face a bill for thousands of dollars for his pet baby monkey's two-month stay at an animal shelter since it was seized by German customs, officials said Friday as a deadline expired for him to reclaim the animal.
The shelter has criticized Bieber for keeping such a young monkey as a pet, saying it shouldn't have been taken away from its mother until it was a year old. Experts say that capuchin monkeys also need to be kept in groups as they are very sociable animals.
Emails from Bieber's management to the animal shelter indicated that the singer doesn't want the monkey anymore.
* Los Angeles County prosecutors say they've charged former "Days of Our Lives" actor Dylan Michael Patton (he played Will Horton) with selling cocaine out of his Agoura Hills home.
Sheriff's deputies arrested Patton after searching his home with a warrant Tuesday. They say they seized an unspecified amount of cocaine.
We were always suspicious of the sands in that hourglass.
- Daily News wire services
contributed to this report.