DEAR ABBY: I own a business with just two employees, my husband and a very old friend. The friend has been in the business for 15 years, and he is critical to running it. My husband has been with me for 11 years, but in the business for only three. He is not critical to running the business.
Their relationship is a constant strain. Neither one likes the other.
Their conflict is affecting the smooth functioning of the business. What should I do to end the hostility?
- Walking on Eggshells
DEAR WALKING ON EGGSHELLS: Because the present situation makes it difficult for all of you to function together, I'm suggesting that you tell your husband you love him, but either he must get along with the longtime employee or leave the business - because it's the business that is paying the bills, feeding and putting a roof over all of you!
DEAR ABBY: A friend, "Wanda," invited my husband, "Hugh," and me to a dinner party two years ago. Hugh had too much to drink and insulted not only Wanda but also one of the guests. This is not the first time he has done this at dinner parties, and his behavior has had a negative impact on some of my best friendships. I can no longer invite my friends over as they no longer want to be around Hugh.
Wanda continues to invite me to her dinner parties, but has made a point of telling me that Hugh is not invited. Not wanting to lose another friend, I have been going alone. I let my husband know why, and he says it doesn't bother him, but I feel guilty attending without him.
- Party of One
DEAR PARTY: If your husband can't control his behavior when he's had a drink or two, then he should not be drinking in public. That he says it "doesn't bother him" that he's no longer welcome should be a glaring signal that he needs help. Because he isn't ready to do something about his problem, continue to socialize without him. That you do is admirable, so please stop feeling guilty about it.