Dave on Demand: Unreal!
Households crawling with cats or crammed with kids, people consumed by bizarre compulsions. The reality-TV world has no known boundaries.
Go ahead. Let your imagination run wild.
Chances are, whatever came into your head, however outlandish - there's a reality show for that.
Are you a bargain hunter? Try Extreme Couponing on TLC, where savings-obsessed shoppers stockpile discount coupons for their trips to the store.
The show will even teach you to how to dumpster-dive for vouchers. (No, I am not making this up. There's no need to fabricate with reality shows.)
Just pray you don't get in the checkout line behind one of these customers. It takes half an hour just to scan their coupons.
All kinds of sociological insights are available. Marvel at My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding on TLC. Apparently it's traditional among the Romany to stage nuptials so gaudy it looks as if Lady Gaga was your wedding planner.
Curious about the dynamics in a big family? There's TLC's 19 Kids & Counting. It focuses on the Duggar family in Arkansas, who have enough children to staff an airport. And all of their names start with a "J" (including Jinger). You better have a strong bladder in that house.
The Duggars look positively lonely compared to the people documented in Confessions: Animal Hoarding on Animal Planet. A lady with 80 cats? Ho-hum. Meet the man with 130 hens and roosters in his house. Or the guy who keeps 150 rodents, birds, and serpents. In his apartment. Why does it not surprise me that most of the creature keepers on this show are described as "eccentric loners"?
There are disturbing sanitary issues inherent in every episode of Animal Hoarding. That's why I prefer My Strange Addiction on TLC. Sure, the subjects are crazy cuckoo compulsive, but at least they tend to be neat.
Take the lady who eats laundry detergent by the measuring cup or the one who chews and swallows at least half a roll of toilet paper every day.
You say you like competitions. How about E!'s Bridalplasty, where a dozen brides-to-be battle to win extensive cosmetic surgery before they walk down the aisle. You should see the surprised looks on those grooms' faces when they lift up the veils.
Best in show goes to TLC's I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant. Yeah, it's pretty self-descriptive: women who go through an entire cycle - from conception to delivery - without ever suspecting there's a baby on the way.
Really? No clue? Even when you were eating sardines a la mode off a plate balanced on your stomach?
Reality TV is a constant reminder that it takes all kinds.
Hear him roar. HBO's Game of Thrones is catching on. The audience for the swords-and-subversives saga has grown by 23 percent in a few short weeks.
My favorite character is Khal Drogo, imperious and shirtless king of a vast tribe of horse warriors. HBO has submitted Jason Momoa, who plays Khal, for a best-supporting-actor Emmy.
How can he lose? Momoa has maybe two lines per episode and he bellows them in an incomprehensible and apocryphal foreign language.
Hello, Newman. Hackers recently hijacked the names and passwords of a million consumers from Sony's database.
Certain patterns emerged. For instance, among the most used passwords were "password," "123456," and "Seinfeld." Why would the title of a TV show be so commonplace in the realm of Internet security?
Beats me. Most analysts recommend that to lessen the chances of being hacked, you should use three out of the four character types on the keyboard.
That's why I always go with the recently canceled CBS sitcom $#*! My Dad Says.
Not that there's anything wrong with "Seinfeld."
First things first. It has just been announced that Chevrolet has won the rights to be the official car of X Factor, Simon Cowell's new talent show, due in the fall.
They can't settle on the panel of judges for the program, but at least they have their sponsor locked down.
It's good to have priorities.