WHEN ALL those rocks stop banging against each other, is there anything else going on in

Britney Spears

' head?

The pop puff pastry was a no-show at a court-ordered deposition yesterday morning in her ongoing child custody dispute with ex-husband Kevin Federline.

The usual media horde had assembled outside K-Fed lawyer Mark Vincent Kaplan's office waiting for Spears, but Kaplan was told Britney wasn't coming.

She didn't feel well.

(For the record, Tattle didn't feel well yesterday either. Must be something going around.)

"She's going to show at a later date," Kaplan said, "but we don't waive any rights to ask for certain relief from the court as a result of having a court-ordered deposition not attended."

K-Fed has temporary custody of the children because Spears, who has limited visitation rights, has defied court orders.

And common sense.

Category 5 faces legal 'Storm'

Travis Tritt has sued his new label, Category 5 Records, and its president, Ray Termini, alleging breach of contract and fraud.

He's seeking $10 million.

Tritt, whose latest album was aptly titled "The Storm," contends that Termini misrepresented Category 5's skill and competence as a record company, its financial resources and its ability to honor its financial obligations. He claims he was denied complete creative control as promised, as well as money for promotional travel and royalty payments.

Termini's previous experience with records seems to have been strictly medical.

He is the chief exec of Haven Healthcare, a New England nursing- home company that recently declared bankruptcy amid a state inquiry into whether he illegally used Medicaid funds to launch Category 5. State officials allege that the company let bills go unpaid while kicking in company cash for the label.

Termini denies this.

As of Dec. 1, Category 5 owed Tritt more than $399,300, according to the suit. The label's other artists include Sammy Kershaw, George Jones and Shauna, according to its Web site.

Fantasy may be a good option

Best-selling fantasy author Terry Pratchett (the Discworld series) has been diagnosed with a rare form of early-onset Alzheimer's, he said in a message posted to his illustrator's Web site.

In a brief note to fans titled "An Embuggerance," Pratchett, 59, said he was taking the news "fairly philosophically" and "possibly with a mild optimism."

"I would have liked to keep this one quiet for a little while, but because of upcoming conventions and of course the need to keep my publishers informed, it seems to me unfair to withhold the news," he wrote on the Web site of Paul Kidby, who has illustrated many of his books.

Pratchett's latest work, "Making Money," was published in September, and Harper Children's was due to publish a non-Discworld novel, "Nation," in 2008.

Pratchett said that he would continue completing "Nation" and that he had begun working on "Unseen Academicals" - another writing project.

"Frankly, I would prefer it if people kept things cheerful, because I think there's time for at least a few more books yet :o)" he wrote in his message. "I know it's a very human thing to say 'Is there anything I can do' but in this case I would only entertain offers from very high-end experts in brain chemistry."

Tattbits

* Jessica Alba and her boyfriend,

Cash Warren, are expecting a baby in late spring/early summer, her publicist, Brad Cafarelli, said yesterday in an e-mail to the Associated Press.

So counting backwards, when did they break up and quickly get back together?

* The Hollywood Reporter says Ter-

rence Howard, making his Broadway debut; Phylicia Rashad, Anika Noni Rose and James Earl Jones will star in Debbie Allen's revival of Tennessee Williams' Pulitzer Prize-winning "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof."

This will be the first all-African-American version of the play authorized by the Williams estate. It's set to open March 6.

* Shia LaBeouf ("Transformers")

no longer faces criminal charges for refusing to leave a Chicago Walgreen's last month.

Shia was in a Chicago court for only minutes yesterday before prosecutors said they had received a letter from Walgreen Co. and a security company saying they didn't want to continue the case.

LaBeouf, unshaven and wearing a black jacket, didn't speak but smiled at the news.

* Paris Hilton is making a personal

contribution to protecting the environment.

Could it be she'll be reducing hot air emissions by keeping her mouth shut?

Alas, no.

"I changed all the light bulbs to energy-safe light bulbs and I'm buying a hybrid car right now," she said yesterday in Berlin.

(Wonder how much fuel it's going to cost to fly that hybrid back to the states - unless Paris plans to drive it home.)

Hilton said she turns off the lights, doesn't leave the TV on or the water running when she leaves her house.

"Little things that people can do every day to make a huge difference," she said.

So ditzy and yet so wise.

Paris made her green remarks while earning some green from Rich Prosecco, a sparkling wine sold in cans.

Recyclable of course.

* The lock of John Lennon's hair in

the Lennon-autographed book has sold for $48,000 in an auction of Beatles' memorabilia collected by the band's hairdresser.

Gorringes auction house had estimated the hair would sell for $4,000 to $6,000.

No, that would be a lock of Pete Best's hair. *

Daily News wire services contributed to this report.

Send e-mail to gensleh@phillynews.com