So here we are: May 21, the day that a surprising number of people around the world think will mark the beginning of the end - The Rapture.
If this strikes you as news, here's a quick recap: Harold Camping, an 89-year-old Christian evangelist from Oakland, recently declared that decades of studying the Bible had led him to believe that today will, in fact, be Judgment Day, the day that Jesus Christ returns. (The Rapture is supposed to begin locally at 6 p.m.)
Camping launched a massive ad campaign to bring his message to the masses. Those who have heard Camping's prediction fall into two camps: either they believe the preacher, or they think he's nuttier than a roomful of Charlie Sheens.
The Daily News has some helpful advice for folks who fall on either side of the debate.
So, if the Rapture really does start today:
* Start by closing your windows and locking your doors. Hey, it could buy you a few minutes.
* Don't worry about paying that ticket from the Parking Authority. It can't possibly survive Judgment Day, right?
* Tell the in-laws that you won't be making that dinner, after all.
* Reconsider snarky jokes you've been making about today being the end of the world. Ask true believers if they have extra room in their Rapturemobile.
* Go ahead. Cheat on your diet. What the hell?
But if the Rapture turns out to be the biggest nonevent since Y2K:
* Call your boss. Tell that you didn't mean it when you told him to go (bleep) himself.
* Don't make fun of neighbors and co-workers who believed that Judgment Day had arrived. No need to spike the football.
* Kidding! Make fun of neighbors and co-workers. It's not like it's the end of the world.
* Immediately cancel that "Rapture insurance" you purchased from that 1-800 company.
* Go to the Phillies game. With no Rapture-related stress hanging over the team, maybe they'll start to score some runs again.