Dear Abby: Friend who owes her money is going on cruise

DEAR ABBY: My oldest friend owes me a lot of money. I loaned it to her when she was being evicted. She has now come into some money and is going on a cruise.

I asked her to repay me before the trip. She said she "needs the cruise for her mental health." I am shocked and very angry. When I lost my temper and told her off, she accused me of being "greedy and money-obsessed."

Abby, I helped her when she needed it! What should I do?

- Furious In San Francisco

DEAR FURIOUS: When your "friend" returns from her sea cruise, see if you can get her to agree to a repayment plan for the sake of your mental - and financial - health. However, if she refuses, you may have to write off the loan as tuition in the school of experience. Your mistake was not getting the loan's terms in writing.

DEAR ABBY: Our two children (ages 4 and 1 year) have hyphenated last names. It works well and the names sound elegant together.

My husband and I have made this known in the family and have discussed it when asked about it by various family members. However, over the last four years our choice has been ignored by two relatives from separate sides of our family. They persist in using only my husband's last name for correspondence and gifts. He has suggested returning the mail as "addressee unknown," which I think might come across as rude.

Is there any way of having our children addressed correctly by relatives who seem to want to ignore their real names?

- New York Mommy

DEAR MOMMY: Before doing it your husband's way, try this: Have another chat with the noncompliant relatives, who may come from a different generation. Explain that you gave your children hyphenated last names for a reason, and the omission of "your" name hurts your feelings.