DEAR ABBY: I am a 34-year-old wife and mother of four. I'm concerned about my husband. He is 44 and drinks at home every night after work.
I don't mind him having a few cans of beer, but he drinks between six and 12 a day. He refuses to see a doctor for checkups or when he is sick. I am worried about his health. The drinking could have an impact, and I would like him to have a physical exam to put my mind at ease.
I tell my husband I want him to take care of himself to live longer for our children's sake (our youngest is 4). At times, we argue about it, and I'm tired of fighting over his drinking. His response is, "At least I do it at home and not at the bar."
- Worried Wife in Guam
DEAR WIFE: Your husband is an alcoholic. He may not want to see a doctor because he knows what the doctor will tell him. It is important that you understand you can't control another person's behavior, and the only person who can "get" your husband to stop drinking or cut down is him.
Contact Al-Anon. Al-Anon is a fellowship of family members and friends of alcoholics, and it was created to help people just like you: go to Al-AnonFamilyGroups.org, call 888-4AL-ANON or email firstname.lastname@example.org. I can't guarantee that it will help with your husband's illness - because alcoholism is one - but it will help you to cope.
DEAR ABBY: I'm 13 and in middle school. We have an iPad Pilot Program in which students are given an iPad for a year to use in daily classroom activities. I'm a responsible honor student, yet somehow some scratches appeared on it one day.
My parents are really tight with money. I'm afraid if I tell them, I'll get in trouble. Please tell me what to do.
- In a Bind
DEAR IN A BIND: Some wear and tear on items that are issued to students is to be expected. Stop stalling and tell your parents what happened. They are going to find out eventually, and it is better that they hear it from you.