Did his lack of trying ruin chances with son?

DEAR ABBY: I am a single 25-year-old man with a 15-month-old son. My son is everything to me. His mother and I did not work out well living together.

I have no ill will toward "Andrea." She's a great person and a phenomenal mom. My dilemma is, I constantly regret not working harder to stay with her. I see her new boyfriend with my son and it kills me. I see my son only on my two days off. I wish I could see him more than that, but the only way I could see it happening is if Andrea and I got back together.

Everyone I know says we made the right choice for the three of us. I'm afraid of not being there for my boy as my father wasn't there for me when I was a kid.

- Torn Father in Connecticut

DEAR TORN: Feeling as you do, that you didn't try hard enough to save your relationship, discuss it with your ex and see how she feels about the possibility of a reconciliation.

However, while I admire your desire to be a good father, it would be unfair to Andrea to try to get back together only to spend more time with your son. Consider asking her how she'd feel about you having him one night during the week in addition to your days off. She may welcome the idea and agree.

DEAR ABBY: What's the proper response when a woman tells you, "You're a lucky woman to have such a good husband who loves you so much"? That phrase bothers me because I feel it is a slap in my face - like what am I, chopped liver? Am I not worthy of a wonderful marriage and family?

Do I say thank you? Smile? Ignore it? I would never tell another woman she is lucky to have her man because I feel it's an insult. Am I overreacting?

- He's Lucky, Too, in Colorado

DEAR HE'S LUCKY, TOO: Yes. The women who acknowledge how lucky you are may be comparing the way your husband treats you in public to the way they are treated by their husbands. Instead of being defensive, smile and say, "I agree. We're lucky to have each other."