The Phoenixville Police Department's blotter, posted twice weekly on the force's Facebook page, offers a glimpse into the bizarre situations authorities in the Chester County town are called to. From arguments over milk that wasn't even spilled to reports of chickens walking down the sidewalk, here's the rest of the best of the Phoenixville Police Department's blotter, from August to January.

Domestic bliss

  • On 01/18/2018 at 12:34AM, police responded to a domestic dispute in an apartment at the Phoenix View apartments. A couple was arguing because the husband recorded his wife having an affair with a co-worker on his cell phone and threatened to post the encounter on Facebook. The husband agreed to not post the video but wanted the police report to reflect that his wife is an adulteress.
  • On 01/11/2018 at 3:54PM, police responded to a family dispute at a residence in the 300 block of Prospect Street. A father, son, and step-son were arguing over a gallon of milk. The father locked the milk in the refrigerator he keeps in his bedroom and the son and step-son each claimed they split the bill for the milk and should have access to it.
  • On 11/25/2017 at 12:45AM, Phoenixville Fire Department personnel stopped to assist a couple that were stumbling on the sidewalk at the intersection of Gay Street and Church Street. The wife, age 49, was intoxicated and her husband, 56, was having trouble getting her home. The couple, visiting from Gulfport, Fla., called a friend who drove the woman home. The husband walked the rest of the way because his wife was mad at him.

Distracted driving

  • On 01/16/2018 at 8:23PM, police responded to the intersection of Harrison Avenue and Tyler Avenue for the report of an SUV stopped at a stop sign for about 30 minutes. Officer Glennon approached the driver, a 29 year old woman from Glenmoore, who told the officer that she was checking her Facebook page and didn't realize she had been sitting there so long. Distracted driving?
  • On 01/07/2018 at midnight, a 50 year old Phoenixville resident decided to go off-roading in the snow after dropping a friend off at the Court at the Ledges on Fillmore Street. The man was driving a Land Rover from the dealership he works at and it started sliding down a hill in the snow and hit a fence. The Land Rover was teetering on the edge of a retaining wall so the man left the SUV overnight and came back in the morning to get it. The man was issued a ticket for trespassing with a vehicle on private property when he came to retrieve the car.
  • On 01/03/2018 at 8:10PM, a motorist reported that he was following an erratic driver on Route 23 near West Bridge Street. Officer Komorowski was near the intersection and followed the car for several blocks but did not observe any traffic violations. The driver pulled into the Gateway Pharmacy parking lot and the officer asked her if she was ok. The 43-year-old driver from Phoenixville told the officer that she was packing her lunch while she was driving. She was given a warning about distracted driving.

Nothing to see here

  • On 01/18/2018 at 12:26AM, police responded to McDonald's for the report of a suspicious person sitting in a car in the parking lot. Officer Lee approached the man, 55 of Barto, Pa., and he was just eating his McDonalds and watching YouTube on his tablet. The man told the officer he always eats his drive-thru meals in his car.
  • On 12/22/2017 at 4:43PM, police responded to Walgreens for the report of a man drinking a bottle of vodka inside his Toyota in the parking lot. Officers made contact with the Mont Clare resident and discovered that he was drinking a bottle of Fiji water.

Drunk and disorderly

  • On 12/16/2017 at 2:09AM, Officer MacDonald observed a man drinking a cocktail while he was walking in the 300 block of Bridge Street. The 27-year-old Harleysville man asked the officer if he wanted a sip of the mixed drink. The officer declined and issued the man a summons for the open container ordinance.
  • On 12/03/2017 at 12:42AM, Officer Bryan observed a Honda mini-van being driven with the headlights off on Bridge Street at Gay Street. The driver, a 23-year-old man from Trappe, stopped his van next to the officer's police car and asked for directions to Pizza Hut. The officer could tell that the man had been drinking so he told him to pull over. After he failed several field sobriety tests, the man was arrested for DUI and released to his parents.
  • At 2:24AM (on 11/23/2017), an intoxicated man interfered with the 2:15AM arrest of the Philadelphia man who was causing a disturbance. The 25-year-old Norristown man claimed he was an attorney and wanted to represent the man being arrested. He refused several warnings to back away and at one point he slapped a bystander who was trying to persuade him to leave the area. The jailhouse lawyer was arrested for public drunkenness and was released when he was sober.

Love thy neighbor

  • On 12/02/2017 at 11:47PM, police responded to an apartment building in the unit block of Nutt Road. A 60-year-old man reported that the woman in the apartment above him uses too much hot water when she showers and doesn't leave any for him. The 60-year-old woman agreed to take quicker showers to conserve hot water.
  • On 11/15/2017 at 11:10AM, police responded to a neighbor dispute in the 200 block of Fifth Avenue. A resident reported that her neighbor looked at her and then spit on the ground. Officer Dobry spoke to the neighbor and he explained that he was just clearing phlegm from his throat and did not intend to offend his neighbor.
  • On 09/23/2017 at 2:03AM, a woman knocked on a resident's door in the unit block of Main Street and asked to use the bathroom. The resident let the women in but she did not emerge from his bathroom so he called the police. Officers arrived and forced the bathroom door open and discovered that the women had climbed out the window and left.

Thank you, kindly

  • On 12/24/2017 at 2:09PM, police responded to a disturbance at the intersection of Route 23 and Gay Street. A group of pro-life activists reported that a motorist jumped out of his car and began kicking their signs and throwing thrash at them. The group snapped the man's photo and got his tag number before he drove off. Officer Dutch tracked the driver down and the 36-year-old East Pikeland resident explained that he did not like the signs the activists were holding so he did something about it. The activists did not want the man arrested because it was Christmas Eve so he got off with a warning.
  • On 11/20/2017 at 3:30AM, a 52-year-old man from Indiana, Pa., walked into the Sunoco station on Nutt Road and asked the clerk to call the police because he had too much to drink and shouldn't be driving anymore. Officer Fusco arrived and the man asked him for a ride to a nearby motel. The officer drove the man to the Mainstay motel for the night. The clerk let the man park his car in the lot until the next morning.
  • On 11/10/2017 at 3:54PM, a resident in the 300 block of Third Avenue reported that there were two chickens walking on the sidewalk. The resident called back before the officer arrived and informed us that the chickens made it home safely.