Learn how to build the perfect dating profile from Philly matchmakers

Is creating a profile to meet an attractive stranger on a dating app the bane of your existence? You’re not alone.

“People believe the right person is out there but aren’t finding them on the apps,” said Erika Kaplan, vice president of membership for Three Day Rule. She launched the matchmaking company’s Philadelphia market in 2016 and recruits and sources matches for clients, while also helping them on the apps.

They’re burnt out swiping for love with no avail in a city that often feels like a small town, said Kaplan.

“If I could sum up the dating scene in one sentence — everyone who comes to me thinks they’ve dated everyone and exhausted their entire network. But Philly is so much bigger than people think it is.”

Compiling photos of yourself, filling out curated prompts and crafting your version of your best self online can be a daunting — and frustrating — task. While dating apps like Hinge and Bumble offer a step-by-step process to set up a profile, knowing what to include to secure a worthy match is a bit trickier.

To help you cast a wider net and stand out against the algorithm, the Inquirer spoke to Kaplan and Philly matchmaker Kristi D. Price of KP Matchmaking about what you need to build the perfect dating profile.

Choose the prompts that inspire you to share something important about yourself. “It’s all about conversation starters,” Kaplan said. “Pick prompts that allow you to display something that you would want a future partner to know that tells your story a bit.”

“If the question (in the prompt) can pull out your best self qualities about you and why you’re so unique, use them — maybe with a little bit of humor,” Price suggested.

Remember to leave baggage at the door. Dating profiles are highlight reels to introduce you to potential matches, not the place to talk about exes and “air dirty laundry really early on,” Kaplan said. They should be real and authentic to you, opening the door to talk about things that matter to you.

“It’s really about being approachable, which is so hard in the real world these days,” Kaplan said.

Drop hints on where you’d like to go for a date by sharing some of the places you like to frequent in the city, Kaplan said. Maybe that’s with a photo of you running up the art museum steps or answering a prompt about your desire to find a new dive bar. This lets you connect on common interests and makes it easier to plan a fun date.

If you’re into Philly sports, mention it — we are known for our passionate fans. It’s more likely the algorithm will find a cute Eagles fan for you to match with if you’ve got “Go Birds” written in your bio.

“You want to make it easy for someone to message you with something unique,” Kaplan said. Maybe include a photo at a pottery class or on that fun trip you took to Spain last year.

If you can, limit the selfies. “It can come off a little bit self absorbed to some people,” Price said. “Selfies are cute, but I think it’s overdone.” You don’t want shirtless pictures either — be sexy but keep it classy, Price advised. You’ll also want to take those sunglasses off and show your face. “You want to show that you have nothing to hide and show your confidence,” Kaplan said. Photos with a group of friends are OK as long as it’s clear from the other photos who you are.

Men: A word to the wise from Price, fish pics are “a big no-no.”

Make sure your photos are up to date. Price advises photos can be six months to a year old, but nothing beyond that. Avoid using filters on photos too. “You don’t want to show up on your date and not look like your photo,” Price said. “It misrepresents yourself. People just think — all right, you’re already a liar.”

Regardless of the app, the first photo in your profile should clearly show who you are, doing something you love — maybe it’s a shot of you horseback riding or sipping coffee. Be sure to have a diverse group of four to six photos — but the more the merrier, Kaplan advised. Include photos of your travels, weekend activities, full body shots and self-portraits.

Consider including voice prompts and record messages to “speak” to a potential match before your meet-cute. Your matches may feel more inclined to talk, and you can deliver that killer opening line more naturally.

Kaplan and Price recommend avoiding the “do not message me if …” or “swipe left, if …” prompts. Cast a wide net rather than giving people a chance to disqualify themselves because they don’t fit a specific description.

Let your fun, flirty side shine with witty messages and positive affirmations. “People will go ‘oh, this person is someone I want to meet’ — because who doesn’t want to meet some who has a good sense of humor,” Price said.