If you haven’t been paying attention to the Eagles’ troubles, let’s get you up to speed
It might seem like everyone in the Greater Philadelphia area has a firm grasp of all the problems plaguing the Eagles. But not everyone is paying close attention to the Eagles. Here's the skinny.
One of the regrettable developments of the modern media age is that, too often, coverage of a particular subject — whether it’s sports, politics, or whatever strange currents were vibrating between Robert F. Kennedy Jr. and Olivia Nuzzi during the summer of 2024 — presumes that news consumers already are intimately familiar with a story’s background and details.
The truth is that not everyone, not even most of us, can know the ins and outs of every single news item that pops up, slot-machine-style, on our smartphones and social media scrolls. People are busy and preoccupied, especially this time of year. They have jobs to work, bills to pay, kids to raise, decorations to put up, gifts to buy, and gatherings to plan, and they’re going to spend whatever free time they have left watching the latest episodes of Stranger Things, because holy mother of mercy are those episodes long.
Here at The Inquirer, we’re not about to make that same mistake. Sure, it might seem like everyone in the Philadelphia area has a firm grasp of all the problems plaguing the Eagles these days. But there are plenty of people out there who either don’t follow the Eagles closely or pay just enough attention to wonder why fans and media are making such a fuss about them. Didn’t they just win the Super Bowl? And isn’t their record pretty good? And don’t they still have that cutie-patootie Cooper DeWhatshisname?
So in the interest of getting everyone up to speed on the big issues around this team ahead of its game Monday night against the Los Angeles Chargers, here’s a quick review of what’s been happening. Once you read this summary, you’ll be able to speak with total confidence about the Eagles at any holiday party, even to those insufferable neighbors whose Christmas lights are brighter and redder than a Kenny Rogers Roasters sign.
Let’s start with Nick Sirianni, the Eagles’ coach. Over his four-plus seasons, Sirianni has pulled off the remarkable feat of leading the team to the playoffs four times, winning one Super Bowl, reaching another, compiling the fifth-highest winning percentage among the 537 head coaches in the 105-year history of the National Football League, and still convincing most Eagles fans that he has no idea what the hell he’s doing. In fact, many Eagles fans wonder exactly what Sirianni does do, since he does not call plays on offense, does not have much to do with the defense, has minimal say-so over personnel matters, and has instilled so much discipline and precision in his players that they have committed the fifth-most penalties in the league this season.
The offense has struggled, and coordinator Kevin Patullo has come under fire for his rudimentary play design, his unimaginative play calling, and his inability to persuade quarterback Jalen Hurts to throw to receivers who aren’t already standing alone in an empty cornfield. The public anger at Patullo became so intense that, on the morning after the Eagles’ recent loss to the Chicago Bears, his house was egged — a stupid, childish, and completely indefensible act, especially since there’s no evidence that Patullo gave out apples and black licorice on Halloween this year.
Hurts has faced his share of criticism, as well, and not merely because wideouts A.J. Brown and DeVonta Smith could run their routes, recite the first four stanzas of The Waste Land, then rerun their routes — and Hurts still would be holding the ball, waiting for them to get really open. The Eagles used to have Hurts carry the ball a lot. But not anymore. For a couple of weeks, the Eagles had Hurts take more snaps from under center, which allowed them to use a wider array of plays. But not anymore. The general belief is that Hurts isn’t totally comfortable and on board with those tactics, so they have been phased out of the offense, much like the entire running game has. Hurts also has taken to speaking during postgame press conferences as if he were cracking open fortune cookies and reading the messages, and his admiration of Michael Jordan and his affiliation with the Jordan Brand have become such a huge part of his persona that it won’t be long before he starts answering the question, How’s it going, Jalen? by turning to an invisible TV camera and saying, I took that personally.
Brown himself has been the source of a good bit of controversy for his frequent, cryptic social media posts — an unnecessary distraction, given that retweeting a Mike-Myers-as-Dr.-Evil THROW ME A FRICKIN’ BONE HERE meme would have sufficed. People have been debating whether Brown is a team-first guy who is using extreme means to call attention to the Eagles’ lousy passing game or a me-first diva who is most happy when he gets his. No one seems to accept that the correct position to take on the matter is Yes.
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Meanwhile, Saquon Barkley has morphed into DeMarco Murray. The offensive line is beat up, hasn’t been blocking well even when its members were reasonably healthy, and lately has been failing to push Hurts’ tush. The defense just lost its most talented player to a shoulder procedure, still hasn’t solidified its No. 2 cornerback spot, and this week attempted to solidify that spot not by putting Cooper Patootie there but by hoping to bring back a nearly-35-year-old former No. 2 cornerback. And Jeffrey Lurie would like to see if all these issues might be solved by having someone else pay to build him a domed stadium.
That about does it. Now you have the skinny on the 2025 Eagles. You wouldn’t know, from this synopsis of their season, that they’re 8-4, in first place in their division, and likely to be favored in four of their remaining five games. But at least you’ll have the requisite information and context to hold your own in any conversation about them. Unless your Kenny Rogers neighbor asks for your thoughts on going for two when you’re down nine. In that case, make a beeline for the bar and don’t look back.