Should I fake sick so I can go to the Phillies’ home opener?

Two Inquirer staffers, who are also huge Phillies fans, chatted to answer this week’s question …

I was just gifted tickets to the Phillies’ home opener. It’s too late for me to request the day off from work. Do I fake sick or come clean and hope my usually cool boss is cool with it?

(Have your own question? Email us.)

Sam Ruland, features planning and coverage editor

There is no version of this story where you don’t go to the Phillies’ home opener. Be honest with your (usually cool!) boss.

Aubrey Whelan, health and science reporter

As a health reporter I think I can confidently say that going to the Phillies game is the healthiest option here.

Also, the home opener is at 4:15, so if you work a 9 to 5 you might not even need to take a whole sick day. Just cut out at 3! Your cool boss will understand.

Sam Ruland

And if your boss isn’t cool about it? Well, you’ve just learned something very important about your boss.

Aubrey Whelan

Sam, have you ever gone to a home opener? I have not! (Does this person have an extra ticket? I feel like I might have a cold coming on around March 26.)

Sam Ruland

Oh yes! I always go to the home opener. It’s pretty much a federal holiday in my house. And I now would consider it bad luck to not go.

But to your point about cutting out of work early … let’s be real — the home opener is the one game you do not show up late to. This is a “get there early, walk around, maybe a few drinks in the parking lot, grab the giveaway, secure a hot dog before first pitch, and absolutely do not miss the player intros” situation.

So sure … cut out early. Just, like … 1 p.m. early … or noon.

But what do you do IF the boss says no?

Aubrey Whelan

Tragically, you’ve suddenly become very ill. It’s so upsetting that you’ll now have to miss work AND your baseball game. And it’s so crazy that your doppelgänger was caught on the jumbotron at the game!

Sam Ruland

Truly devastating. Thoughts and prayers during this difficult time. It’s crazy how illness can strike so suddenly … and also how strong the resemblance is between you and that extremely healthy looking person double-fisting beers behind home plate.

Aubrey Whelan

I do think that “I have to go to a baseball game” should be an acceptable reason to take a sick day in Philadelphia. I considered taking several after the playoffs this year.

Sam Ruland

Also … not to be that person, but isn’t this literally what personal days are for? Like we’re all out here begging for permission when the policy is like, “Hey … this is exactly your business.” Use the personal day and protect your peace.

I guess it differs from workplace to workplace, but I would consider this a mental health day.

Aubrey Whelan

Perhaps this person has a vitally important job where it’s tricky to request time off on short notice. I am also terrible about taking vacation myself; I always have a few days left over at the end of the year. And I wish I had spent them all at Phillies games.

Sam Ruland

Ask like a responsible adult, but let’s be real. You’re going. The Phillies need you.

So be honest first, offer to make up the work later — and if things go sideways, maybe stay off the jumbotron.

Aubrey Whelan

Even if you’re absolutely swamped at work, I think any self-respecting Philadephian boss would probably understand — or at least let you take a half day.

(In case my editor is reading this, I have never actually faked sick to go to a baseball game.)

To any other bosses reading this, morale at your workplace will skyrocket if you just let your employees have a nice day at the ballpark. To city officials reading this, please consider making opening day a citywide holiday so no one has to contemplate lying to their manager. Go Phils.