Meghan Markle is strong, but it’s her vulnerability that holds the power to topple the monarchy | Elizabeth Wellington

Seventeen million Americans watched Meghan Markle carry on quite the steely chat with talk show goddess Oprah Winfrey. The former Duchess of Sussex sat firm in her truth. No, Markle said, she never made Kate Middleton cry. And yes, someone within the monarchy wondered aloud if Meghan and Harry’s children might be too dark.

How rich.

And while Markle’s anger was palpable, it was her vulnerability that was the most compelling. Her eyes welled as she shared with Winfrey that someone within the royal family suggested she dial her personality back by 50%. (I wonder which half.) Her voice cracked as she talked about how living with racism nearly drove her to suicide.

“I was really ashamed to say it and ashamed to admit it to Harry,” Markle told a visibly stunned Winfrey. “But I knew if I didn’t say it, that I would do it. I didn’t want to be alive anymore. That was a very clear and real and frightening constant thought.”

» READ MORE: Meghan Markle proved being a princess isn’t what it’s cracked up to be — especially if you’re black | Elizabeth Wellington

Instead of getting lost in the fodder juicy enough for an incredible season of The Crown, let’s focus on the courage it took for Markle to bare her soul in a world that constantly dismisses her reality. Her very existence challenged a centuries-old monarchy fueled by the twin demons of colonialism and racism. But instead of shrinking in fear and consternation, Markle chose to raise the royal curtain with conviction and candor. In doing so, she placed herself squarely on her strength and vulnerability, a space that Black women are rarely allowed to occupy.

And it’s no accident that Winfrey, the most powerful Black woman in the world of media, provided the platform.

I can hear the naysayers already: This is the price people pay to become part of the royal family. Meghan should be happy. Did she think her fate would be different from Diana’s? This is not racism, this is life. You can’t walk into someone’s house and change the rules.

Let’s be clear, I’m pretty sure Markle didn’t expect to walk into a modern-day version of Bridgerton, Shonda Rhimes’ multicultural version of 19th-century high society England, where no one flinched at the idea of a Black duke. But I believe Markle when she says the rules were changed for her simply because she breathed.

There is no other way to explain such in-your-face disrespect. The palace, who Harry said in the interview has the power to shut down the press’ insolence, let slide headlines that suggested Markle was “Straight Outta Compton.” When the press likened her unborn child to a monkey, you got the sense that nobody did anything about it. “Rude and racist are not the same thing,” Markle told Winfrey.

It was so conspicuous that even Harry, who said that he was pretty much blindly ignorant about the workings of institutional racism before he started dating Markle, was stunned. “It takes living in her shoes, in this instance for a day or those first eight days, to see where it’s gonna go and how far they were gonna take it and be so blatant about it,” Harry told Winfrey.

» READ MORE: Systemic racism has affected all of us. Here’s how to start unlearning its harmful lessons. | Elizabeth Wellington

This is how racism works. It’s slick. Those who are discriminated against must prove it. And when we do, all of a sudden it’s a misunderstanding.

It becomes clear in this interview that Harry was effectively cut off because his wife is Black. If that’s not racist, I don’t know what else is. What else do you call being stripped of royal security and your family no longer taking your calls? But this is the kicker: Even before a child was born, the palace discussed removing the honorifics Prince and Princess from the couple’s future children.

“The idea that the first member of color in the family not being titled in the same way that the other grandchildren would be,” Markle told Oprah, her tone incredulous as if she still didn’t believe it. “It’s not their right to take it away, to change the convention for Archie. Why?”

Markle never got an answer.

The beauty of Sunday night’s interview is that Winfrey didn’t get caught up in distractions like Megzit, or Jezebel name-calling. She asked Markle the hard questions. She didn’t interrupt. She let Markle tell her story. And she showed us that she believed her. The focus of this interview was the truth as told from one Black woman to another.

If anyone understands the power of vulnerability, it’s Winfrey. She’s built an empire by showing women how to speak our truths. We all have a hard time with vulnerability as society confuses stoicism with strength. When the truth is, it is a means of survival. Women have only recently grabbed ahold of our agency when it comes to how we dress and how we are addressed. Vulnerability is the most challenging part to figure out. The hallmark of Princess Diana’s legacy is her vulnerability, but the monarchy saw it as her greatest weakness while she was alive.

Multiply that reality by a thousand for Black woman. And when you add racism, vulnerability is even more unavailable. Winfrey may have millions of dollars and endless resources, but she knows what’s like to be silenced because she’s Black and too scared to speak up. She only found her strength when stood in her truth. Winfrey knows the only way to vanquish an -ism — sexism, ageism, and especially racism — is to shine a light on it. Winfrey gave Markle — the first Black woman to assume such a role in the palace and experience the racism firsthand — support for her to show her vulnerability. Because Winfrey knows its power.

No, the monarchy won’t topple overnight. And Black people across the world won’t magically find the shackles loosened. But every time a person in power acknowledges the pain of racism is real, that’s one more lie that can’t be swept under the rug. One more truth that has to be acknowledged. And, in that way, vulnerability becomes one more powerful weapon we can use in this cresting sea of change.