Forbes, once a financial news mag, now seems to produce nothing but celeb lists.

Its latest, most prestigious list - the annual Celebrity 100 - is out, and it contains quite a doozy: It is not topped by Oprah Winfrey, who seems to have dominated it for the last century. (Well, she was No. 1 last year, anyway.)

So, who is the most powerful boldfacer in the universe? Angelina Jolie.

Based on a secret formula that takes into account earnings and media exposure, the list ranks Jolie, who made $27 mil last year, above No. 2 Oprah, even though the talk-show goddess raked in $275 mil. Rounding out the top five are Madonna ($110 mil), Beyoncé Knowles ($87 mil), and Tiger Woods ($110 mil).

The economic downturn has seriously hampered the growth in celeb earnings: Cumulative earnings this year were $4.1 billion, only a few cents more than last year's $4 billion.

No breakup for Brangelina

Don't believe tabloid reports that Brad Pitt (No. 9 on the Forbes list) has lost his love - or lust - for Angie. Brangelina's rep says a National Enquirer report of a breakup is "not true."

Nothing is good enough

Not if you're a celeb.

Cameron Diaz - envy of millions of women around the world - says she's not happy with her bod. "I'd love a bigger butt, more meat on my bones," the Charlie's Angels star tells Marie Claire in its July issue. "I'd love to be more voluptuous. It's just not my body type." Boo-hoo . . .

Moving on to less important issues, Cam says the environment needs her help.

"The planet needs a publicist," says Cam, who has shot a video in which she talks to the Average Jane & Joe about caring for our mother, Gaia. "It's the planet, you know what I mean? She should be . . . a star. How do we make this little planet of ours a big star? I want everybody to know who she is." (For one thing, she's not a star. She's a planet.)

Mom Jonas: My boys have desires

"They are men. They have desires. They have testosterone." So says Denise Jonas about her three boys, collectively known and adored as the Jonas Brothers. Mom tells Good Housekeeping that she's 100 percent behind her boys, even if their, ahem, desires get them in trouble. "If they make a mistake, I'm not going to hate them," she says. "I don't think they are above or below being seduced." (Above or below?) "I would be foolish if I thought that. They are tested and tested, like every one of us. I pray for them."

Mom says her boys, Kevin, 21, Joe, 19, and Nick, 16, have been dissed because they made the decision to wear purity rings: "They've been criticized for proclaiming things they never proclaimed," she says. "And what's the criticism? They don't want to go out there giving everyone an STD? What's so terrible about that?"

Nude scenes? All so mundane!

Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock, who share a nude scene in the comedy The Proposal, tell People mag exactly the same thing as every other actor who has done nude scenes: The experience is awkward, not sexy.

"Filming a scene that involves being entirely naked and takes a couple days can be a little awkward," 32-year-old Ryan tells the mag. "Thankfully, you're there for so long and you're doing it for so long that you dispense with the awkwardness pretty quickly and start to have mundane, normal conversations - the difference being you're not wearing pants."

Director Anne Fletcher says the scene took some work: "It was the only scene that I ended up rehearsing because I really wanted to shoot them completely naked."

Eminem: It was an act

The faux scandal that will not die may be dead! Eminem says the MTV Movie Awards incident in which Brüno (Sacha Baron Cohen) sat on his person in a most gross way was all a joke. "We pulled this off better than we rehearsed it," he tells music news site RapRadar.

Bringing Paris to Muslim lands

The invasion of Iraq created a big public relations problem for the U.S. gov. But soon that'll all be forgotten with the discovery of a surefire way to bring the entire Arabic world to its knees: We're about to launch the ultimate WMD of Luv, Paris Hilton. (That's hot . . .)

Paris, who this week admitted reality TV is fake and, like, stupid, is flying to Dubai to shoot an episode of her own MTV show, My New BFF.

Producer Michael Hirschorn says Paris, 28, wants to expand her show into a global franchise (even though she, like, hates reality shows). Hirschorn says the show, which will respect all regional laws and customs, will be "broadcast throughout the Arab region." Could there be a better way to conquer the region?

Badges of Honor run on for tomorrow

Mayor Nutter will be the starter of the inaugural Badges of Honor 5K run at 9 a.m. tomorrow. Runners will start at 11th Street and Pattison Avenue and wend around the sports complex. Runners can register that morning ($30). All proceeds go to the Survivor's Fund, which benefits relatives of fallen police officers, firefighters, and correctional officers.

Contact "SideShow" at sideshow@phillynews.com. This column contains information from Inquirer wire sources.