Sideshow: It's a fat suit, not a baby

Forget those rumors about

Eva Longoria Parker

being pregnant.

Her

Desperate Housewives

costar

Felicity Huffman

says Longoria isn't showing a baby bump.

"She's just fat, that's all there is to it!" the actress told People magazine.

When ABC's dizzy soap returns on Sept. 28, the plot has been advanced five years and Longoria Parker has put on weight to portray Gabrielle as a harried housewife and mom. She will also wear a fat suit for some episodes.

"She looks cute," Huffman said of the padding. "But she's always like, 'Feel my ass! Feel my ass!' All the jokes [on the set] are about Eva and her fat suit."

Saturday Night Live

bowed this week to great fanfare thanks to its opening sketch featuring two prominent political femmes. But it may be hard to duplicate.

Tina Fey

won't commit to returning as

Sarah Palin

. And the show will soon be losing its

Hillary Clinton

. A pregnant

Amy Poehler

says she'll leave the show in a few months to focus on maternity. As she told Men's Vogue, she has no plans to return: The comedian, wife of comic actor

Will Arnett

, already has signed on to star in an NBC series from the producers of

The Office

.

After seven years on

SNL

, Poehler says, "it's going be really hard -

Boyz II Men

hard - to say goodbye to yesterday.

SNL

was dangerous, late-night, last-minute and star-studded, but like any good drug, you need to know when to put it down."

Miley Cyrus

has got herself a new beau. There have been recent sightings of the teen megastar with

Justin Gaston

. Gaston, 20, was a contestant on

Nashville Star

, hosted by Miley's dad,

Billy Ray Cyrus

. But you may know the Louisiana model from his underwear ads for Kenneth Cole and Guest. And he plays the hunky boyfriend in

Taylor Swift

's music video "Love Story."

Miley, 15, was first seen with Gaston at church services in Pasadena, Calif., on Sunday. That night he was at Disney's Concert for Hope, where Miley performed with the

Jonas Brothers

. (Ooh, awkward. Miley used to date

Nick Jonas

.) And Monday they held hands at L.A.'s Century City mall.

We've always been told that the LL in

LL Cool J

stand for "Ladies Love." But we think they really signify "Lavish Lagniappes." The rapper agreed to perform at the MTV Video Music Awards this month, but he had conditions: 14 hotel-room reservations, 14 cross-country airline tickets, a black super-stretch limo, and 24 long-stem roses, dethorned, with individual plastic stem tips. We're guessing he expected company. A whole lot.

After being married to rocker

Chris Robinson

,

Kate Hudson

has had high-profile dalliances with

Owen Wilson

and

Lance Armstrong

.

Currently, however, the actress is living the single life, including blind dates. That's dicey, as she shared at the news conference for her new film,

My Best Friend's Girl

.

"One date, I just left before we even ordered food because the guy was just so deeply boring that it was like, 'I'm going to just save us from all of this and just leave,' " said Hudson, 29. In case you were wondering, he "was in banking. I'm not kidding."

Comedian

Jeff Foxworthy

, the source of all those "You might be a redneck ... " jokes, has signed with Fox for a new animated series, projected as a replacement for the network's aging

King of the Hill

cartoon.

Foxworthy, who also hosts Fox's game show

Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?

, will provide the voice for the lead character in a comedy about a dysfunctional family in the world of NASCAR racing.