Usually this kind of stuff is reserved for Fridays, but since you're so well behaved, we'll give it to you now.
For lunch: Kildare's Irish Pub (4417 Main St., Manayunk) will serve their new 'Merica Burger (that'd be bun, patty, coleslaw, barbecue ketchup, American cheese, apple wood smoked bacon and matchstick potato fries, bun) for only $3 from noon to 2 p.m. today.
For an artistic afternoon: Greater Philadelphia Cultural Alliance's youth initiative Students at Museums in Philly (STAMP) is hosting an afternoon of culture starting at 3 p.m. at the Academy of Natural Sciences (1900 Benjamin Franklin Parkway) with an audio tour. Teens will be able to try out the new tool during a scavenger hunt that will take players from the Academy of Natural Sciences to the Philadelphia Museum of Art, Eastern State Penitentiary, Franklin Institute and the Barnes Foundation (2025 Benjamin Franklin Parkway). The final destination (that'd be the Barnes) will hold a 5:30 p.m. party with food and music from West Philly musician Chill Moody.
For high-caliber entertainment: Innovative circus arts troupe Tangle Movement Arts brings a free performance, "Intersections," to Clark Park (4300 Baltimore Ave.) at 6 p.m. today where undercover performers dressed as ordinary park-goers will swing from trapezes during the Clark Park Farmers Market. Update: This event has been postponed until Thursday, June 4.
For a finale: Be there as La Colombe (1335 Frankford Ave.) wraps up their Thursday night rum distillery tour series. Pop in between 6 p.m. and 8 p.m. for rum knowledge and a taste of the good stuff.
For a festival warmup: Before next month's Firefly Music Festival in Dover, Del., get a chance to win four day passes and sip on complimentary beverages at a 7 p.m. party at Morgan's Pier (221 N. Columbus Blvd.).
For more Things to Do, check out our calendar for the most up-to-date happenings.