Wounded veterans, families pay a life-long price
"Unbreakable Bonds" tells the story of Mighty Moms who support the warriors who fought for us.
WE OFTEN hear, especially in times of war, times such as now, of men and women in our military who "gave their lives for their country."
That means death, the ultimate sacrifice. Other forms of sacrifice might be worse.
Modern medicine means lives formerly ended can be saved - and are.
For many, a saved life is not the end of the story, it's just the beginning. The lucky wounded are treated and released. It is far worse for the unlucky wounded, the catastrophically wounded.
Death brings finality. For the gravely wounded, the airlift back to America begins their second tour, the one they were not prepared for, the one that may last a lifetime.
They spend weeks, months, maybe years in operating rooms, in physical therapy, in rehab centers. Despite the care, they may never be whole again, physically or mentally.
Oct. 6 marked the unveiling of the American Veterans Disabled for Life Memorial on the National Mall, in Washington, D.C. It was one of the few times these heroes received national attention, aside from the scandal that swamped the Veterans Administration.
In the long war on the home front, the family is called upon to sacrifice. That call is usually answered by mothers, often at the cost of a career or a marriage.
"Unbreakable Bonds" is a book that tells that story from the perspective of the mothers called on to provide care - often 24/7 at the start - to their gravely wounded children. Throughout the book - each chapter is devoted to a wounded warrior and a mom - the term Mighty Moms is used to describe the caregiver.
Walter Reed Medical Center gets high praise for medical care, less so in the way it communicates with and treats families.
It is not a "happy" book, sometimes chilling and heartbreaking. But it is inspirational to see the unbreakable bonds of maternal love wrapped around the shattered bodies of those who volunteered to fight America's battles.
Written by Dava Guerin and the Inquirer's Kevin Ferris, the bulk of the book is 10 stories of 10 moms who gave up everything to become caretakers for their sons (and one daughter), all of whom, except one, survived. The $19.95 book will be published Nov. 18 by Skyhorse Publishing. (A portion of book sales goes to the moms and wounded warriors.)
The mothers come from a variety of backgrounds, from farming to law, but when their children teetered on the brink of death, they abandoned everything to fly to their sides. The stories brim with unconditional love, some laughter, some anger and a portion of fear and pain.
Some wounded warriors wonder if anyone will ever love them. Some manage to laugh, such as Lance Cpl. Mark Fidler, missing both legs, who wisecracks, "I had a blast in Afghanistan."
Because of their wounds, some will never go on vacation or hold an infant son or daughter. The worst cases will spend their lives in hospitals or nursing homes, dependent on others.
Most of those in the book were victims of improvised explosive devices. In addition to blowing off limbs, IEDs cause grotesque, life-threatening infections from dirt blasted into gaping wounds.
Those suffering with traumatic brain injury, the "signature wound" of Afghanistan, may never be the same again. Arms and legs can be replaced by artificial limbs, providing a life approaching normalcy. For the brain-injured, nothing can replace cognitive ability.
These wounded didn't die, but they will suffer their entire lives.
The families, who adjust their lives to be always near and to protect their damaged warriors, also give their lives for their country.
It's not a pleasant thought, but one we should think, at least long enough to whisper a prayer, at times such as now.
Phone: 215-854-5977
On Twitter: @StuBykofsky
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