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When I learned my toddler could get the COVID-19 vaccine, ‘I cried with joy’

For parents of kids under five, this pandemic has dragged on.

Tracee Dobbins with her daughter. She writes about the struggles of giving birth right before the pandemic hit, and the joy she feels at finally knowing her daughter is eligible for the COVID-19 vaccine.
Tracee Dobbins with her daughter. She writes about the struggles of giving birth right before the pandemic hit, and the joy she feels at finally knowing her daughter is eligible for the COVID-19 vaccine.Read moreTracee Dobbins

Throughout my pregnancy, people told me that being a mother is one of life’s greatest accomplishments. But what they didn’t tell me is how to accomplish it during a pandemic.

I gave birth to my daughter in March 2020, when rumors flooded the maternity ward about a virus that was snatching lives with no remorse. Three weeks after she was born, everything shut down.

I lived with my mother, which was a blessing, but she couldn’t relate to what it was like to have a newborn during COVID-19 — especially in those early days, when so much was unknown and scary. My boyfriend didn’t live with us, so for him to see his daughter, he had to go through an entire routine to touch either one of us: Put all clothes in a bag, take a shower, and then change into clothes that were already there. We did the same with anyone who came to the house. A newborn baby seemed so precious and fragile, no one wanted her to get sick.

Then there was the postpartum depression. It’s 1,000 times worse than simply “baby blues,” and when you add in quarantine and all the social isolation of the pandemic, I felt alone and sad all the time, even living with my family. Just imagine how new parents felt who didn’t live with family during the early days of COVID, who had to be alone with their babies with no type of help whatsoever. It hurts my heart to think about it.

Things are much better now. But for parents of kids under 5, this pandemic has dragged on.

It has been so hard sitting at home, watching group after group get approval to get vaccinated, and waiting for our turn. I didn’t feel comfortable sending my daughter to day care or any type of indoor activities without that protection, so she has been isolated for two years. She didn’t get to experience so many of the things that most babies have before COVID, and that makes me really sad.

So when I heard that the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommended the COVID-19 vaccines for kids under age 5, I cried with joy. Literally.

» READ MORE: The U.S. begins vaccinating young children against COVID-19

Still, I’m sad for everything we have lost while waiting for this crucial development. I never had a baby shower because I became sick during my third trimester, so I had planned to have one after my daughter was born when everyone could meet her. But of course that day never came. And neither did her first or second birthday parties.

“Still, I’m sad for everything we have lost while waiting for this crucial development.”

Tracee Dobbins

Since I never really let her out of the house in the beginning of her life, she had a more introverted personality. Everything scared or amazed her. She didn’t see a real tree until she was 5 months old, she’s often confused by strangers without masks, and she is only now meeting family members who were so close to me growing up — and she’s 2. She gets so excited when she sees other babies, because she’s still mostly around adults.

There are so many things she was deprived of in her first years. It amazes me to think that what seems “normal” to her is so different from how I grew up. Will pandemic-era babies ever be able to just run up to another kid on a playground and become best friends for the day without parents arguing about if their kids are vaccinated or if they have a mask before playing together?

This generation of children will grow up differently. I realized that when she turned 2 and I gave her a mask and she knew what to do. To her, it’s the way life is.

But finally, one aspect of our pandemic life is about to change: She is going to get vaccinated.

While most of the region has been raving about COVID being “over,” and how summers in Philly are “back,” we have been sitting here, waiting. For a while, it felt as if people forgot about us.

Now, finally, our time is here. And it is such a relief.

Tracee Dobbins is a stylist/assistant at Panache Hair Design in Center City.